The Philosophy Behind Lies
by E. 0rchid
Summary: Keitaro Urashima has always been obsessed about keeping his promises, but does that mean he'll go against the wishes of the entire planet to keep a dead promise alive? AU. Crossover Fullmetal Alchemist. Keitarox?
1. Introductions

Disclaimer- I do not own Full Metal Alchemist or Love Hina.

Author's Note: For those of you who are wondering, no I haven't forgotten about A Royal Pain?, I'll back to it soon I promise I just have to wait for some more funny to develop in my head.

**The Philosophy Behind Lies**

**Episode 1: Introductions**

"_**Alchemy's First Law, the law of equivalent exchange. The Philosopher's Stone, a tool used to void the notion of equivalent exchange." "Hello, my name is Seui Urashima and I humbly invite you to join me on a quest into a world of mystery and intrigue. I also invite you on a journey toward the truth. What truth you may ask? Well to put it simply a journey toward the truth of my ancestor Keitaro Urashima, the Unfortunate "Immortal" Alchemist. Presumed to be a clumsy dolt as well as a mad man, I seek to uncover the truth behind his infamous quest in order to obtain a relic known as the Philosopher's Stone, and to renounce the lies surrounding both his companions and himself." "Well enough of my pointless babbling, shall we begin?"**_

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Tresembol, 1965**

"Great, just great," a young man mumbled to himself as he ran along a slick cobblestone street. It was raining incredibly hard, in fact the down pour was so powerful that several signs had been knocked over by the force of the rain and the violent winds. While most people were inside their homes keeping dry, this unfortunate young man was currently running through the empty streets trying to find shelter.

The young man was currently donning soaking a forest green cloth cloak, tan khaki pants, a black short sleeveless leather jacket, slightly dingy white dress shirt, and black leather military grade boots. His messy light brown hair was matted down on his head and partially covered his boyish face and extremely large glasses. "I can't believe that they kicked me out of the house," Keitaro griped to himself as he pulled his cloak over his head in a desperate attempt to keep at least part of himself dry. 'Granted it did take me three years to become a State Alchemist, but that really isn't my fault!' Keitaro thought as he ran past several old western style houses, 'Come to think of it though, they were rather proud of me until I said I was going to search for the Philosopher's Stone. Could that have been it? But that doesn't make any sense unless they were sticking to the state guidelines…'

By know Keitaro had run past a dimly lit café on a nameless corner and was now head up a flight of stairs toward an old western style mansion. "Finally! I'm almost there!" Keitaro stated to himself as a sense of euphoria washed over him, 'I can feel the water of that nice hot bath right now!' Unfortunately things wouldn't be that easy for the young, as he soon found out when he tripped on one of the slick stone steps and tumbled down the stairs.

"Owww, damn law of equal exchange," Keitaro muttered to himself as he clutched his head in agony while he slowly picked himself up out of the mud he was now covered in. "Now I definitely need a bath," Keitaro said to himself as he made his way back up the stairs, but this time at a slower pace. After almost ten minutes Keitaro finally made his way up the steps, all the while gasping and wheezing as he used his hands to push his limp body up the last step.

"That was ridiculous, grandma definitely needs to get some type of elevator or something installed," Keitaro muttered to himself as he crawled toward the old mansion. Despite the fact that it was over two centuries old the mansion still looked rather elegant, the white paint on the columns was still fresh, the grand oak doors were still varnished nicely, and sterling silver knobs on the doors looked freshly cleaned and polished. 'I wonder if this place still serves as a government building as well as a hotel,' Keitaro thought to himself as he pulled himself up off of the ground and wrapped his left hand tightly around the silver door knob before he turned it with an audible 'click'. He then forced the large door open and walked into an elegant entrance hall. Looking around he noted all of the things that were still intact from his childhood ranging from the unnaturally bright lights of the sparkling crystal chandelier that hung above him, to the neatly waxed marble floor beneath his feet. Allowing himself to plop down onto a red silk love seat ruining it by smearing mud on it while he took a moment to strip off his soaking cloak and to wring it out over a gold urn. After wringing out his cloak he sat for a moment contemplating his next move before he got up and went toward the spiral stair case.

"Hey grandma you there!" Keitaro cried from the base of the steps, "It's your grandson Keitaro!" After a minute of cupping his ear and listening for a response Keitaro shrugged and walked up the stairs. 'I guess she couldn't hear me from all the way down here,' Keitaro thought to himself as he ascended the steps a walked toward his grandmother's old room. It still had the old oak wood manager sign plastered above it so Keitaro naturally assumed that she was still living in the room. He rapped on the door several times before he calmly waited for a response. After about three minutes Keitaro tried once again, deciding that she might have just been asleep and was having a hard time getting up. Again he waited three minutes before he decided to turn the knob and open the door.

The door creaked nosily, almost enough to wake the dead, as Keitaro forced it open with a cringe evident on his face. After completely opening the door Keitaro looked around the room and noticed that it was completely empty aside from a small double size bed with a navy blue bed spread, a red mandarin rug, and a large oak chest of drawers. "What the!? Did she leave and have me come all the way out here for nothing!" Keitaro cried out as a frantically searched through the endlessly empty chest of drawers. "Great, just great," Keitaro said to himself as he slumped his shoulders dejectedly, "Things can't get much worse than this I suppose." Keitaro then sniffed himself and scrunched up his nose in disgust at the offensive odor. "I guess I'll get cleaned up before I try searching around some more. I'm sure the other guest won't mind if I use the facilities and wash my cloths."

**15 Minutes Later**

"Brrr," Keitaro shivered as he walked into a cold bathroom stark naked, save for a small towel, and stepped onto the even colder pure white tiles. Walking over toward a large bowl tub Keitaro turned both of the sterling silver hot and cold knobs about halfway and waited for the tub to fill with water. Keitaro always had to admit that this bathroom was really nice. Not only was there a gigantic tub, but a custom designed porcelain toilet, an extravagant silver sink, and plenty of light from the small chandelier above.

'I wonder what made grandma want to move west anyway,' Keitaro thought as he ran his finger softly along the water's surface with a dreamy expression on his face, 'It probably had something to do with that day…' As Keitaro spaced out he failed to notice that the bathroom door was slowly creaking open. After another couple of seconds Keitaro shut off the water and slowly climbed into the tub and allowed himself ease into the water as he rested his head on the back of the tub. "Ahhh," Keitaro sighed softly to himself as he allowed both the dirt and his worries to be washed away. After a moment Keitaro removed his glasses and set them on the side of the tub as he grabbed his wash cloth, a bar of soap, and proceeded to wash himself. While all of this was going on a young woman with an angelic face and long auburn hair stuck her head in through a small opening in the door.

"Hey Kitsune, sorry to barge in but would you mind if I joined you? I mean that tub has got to be big enough for two people at the vary least," the auburn haired beauty stated as she stripped out of her blue long sleeve shirt, and black khaki pants revealing her voluptuous form.

"Wha?" Keitaro questioned as he looked up from washing his hair. It was then that he finally noticed that he wasn't alone in the bathroom as the young woman sauntered over to the tub and eased in on the other side. At this point Keitaro felt as though he might have a heart attack at any minute as his eyes went as wide as saucers and a small trace amount of blood trickled down out of his left nostril.

"Man this water feels good! Usually you have it way too hot, but right now it's just right," the girl stated as she ran a hand through her hair and allowed herself to relax even more as she rubbed her leg against the unfortunate Keitaro's.

At this point Keitaro had to shove his rag up his nose in order to keep the blood from spurting out. 'I'm soooo dead,' Keitaro thought to himself to afraid to actually get up and move, 'But I have to admit I've never been this close to a girl before, well aside from her…but that doesn't count.'

"Why are you so being quite?" the young woman questioned as she opened her eyes and regarded the figure sitting in front of her.

'Okay it's official, this girl is blind,' Keitaro thought to himself as he mumbled some incomprehensible nonsense.

"What? Okay Kitsune I'm going to tell you right now that I'm sooo not in the mood for one of your "I'm going to dupe Naru Narusegawa" pranks," Naru stated as leaned forward and got in Keitaro's face with a scowl on hers. Being this close with and attractive woman's lips only mere centimeters away from his own lips made Keitaro a little more excited then he should have been in a situation such as this, unfortunately it was Little Kei that was calling the shots right now as he made his presence known to both parties present.

"What the?" Naru questioned as she furrowed her brows noticing that she felt a poking sensation against her abdomen, "Hey cut it out Kitsune, your hands a little to close for comfort." By now Naru had grabbed onto Kitsune's "hand" and was clutching it tightly. "Wait a minute, this isn't a hand…and you're not Kitsune!" Naru cried as her eyes went wide and she hopped out of the tub at a blinding speed, "You pervert! You just tried to take advantage of me!" Naru cried out again as she growled and balled up her fist.

"Just wait a minute," Keitaro responded as calmly as his quivering form would allow, "You were the one who hopped into the tub with me!" This seemed to stop the girl in her tracks as a blush crept onto her face, but she only stopped momentarily.

"Well what the heck is a man doing in an all girls dormitory!?" Naru retorted as she balled up her fist once again and launched herself at Keitaro.

'Oh crap,' Keitaro thought as his eyes went wide and her fist made contact with his jaw sending him crashing through several walls.

"Well what do we have here?" a young woman with short sandy blond hair asked as she lend over to inspect the fallen Keitaro's limp body, swirls evident in his eyes. Her eyes were extremely slanted, her face soft and slightly rounded, and her equally extremely voluptuous body was almost pooping out of her purple lace underwear set. "Well they say Christmas only comes once a year, but it seems to have come twice," Kitsune stated as she licked her lips seductively as she leaned further down onto Keitaro's body, mashing her chest onto his.

"Hey Kitsune! Have you seen a pervert around here!?" Naru snapped as she flung open the door to Kitsune's room, clad only in a tiny towel, and gazed at the raunchy scene before her. Slapping her hand onto her face and dragging it down she sucked in a deep breath and released a beleaguered sight. "Kitsune, must you try to seduce even the unconscious?" Naru stated as she stalked over toward her friend who had not moved from her position, but was grinning from ear to ear.

"Why not? I mean he is kinda cute, but I guess I'll back off if you want him. I mean it looks like you got to him before I did," Kitsune stated with a chuckle as she saw Naru's face grow a vibrant red after her comment.

"Shut up!" Naru snapped, "Just get out of my way so I can deliver some justice!"

"Now calm down Naru, I mean the man is already unconscious and it looks like you ruffed him up pretty bad," Kitsune stated as she noted the deep scars that adorned Keitaro's small but toned chest.

"Hey I didn't give him those!" Naru snapped once again in her defense as she pointed her index finger vehemently at the chuckling Kitsune.

"Is something wrong Naru-sempai?" a young woman with raven hair asked as she stepped into the room behind Naru with a concerned expression etched into her features. The young woman was dressed in a slightly worn white gi and red hamaka pants. Her long black hair was tied back into a lose ponytail, and her bangs hung over her deep grey eyes which framed her slender angelic face perfectly. In her hand she held a brilliant sliver katana and a stainless ivory sheath. Both looked to have been forged by the deceased Murasameitichi, a world renowned eastern blacksmith.

After a moment the raven haired beauty noticed both Kitsune and Keitaro sprawled out on the floor. The girl's face contorted into a look of rage and hate as she glared daggers into the unconscious Keitaro. Breathing heavily she snapped, "Unhand her right now you vile scum!" as she drew her sword back and shouted, "Rock Splitting Sword Technique!" Suddenly a large wave of ki knocked Kitsune into an adjacent wall and Keitaro back through the wall he had just come through not too long ago.

Landing in the bathroom once again Keitaro laid there not moving an inch as another young woman made her way into the bathroom.

"Yay! It's bath time, it's bath time, bath and banana time!" the girl sang merrily as she hopped over Keitaro's unconscious form and landed in front of the tub while munching on a banana. The young woman who had just completely ignored the unconscious Keitaro had long platinum blond hair, and smooth brown skin. Her eyes were a vibrant jade green, and her face had a look of innocence about it. Turning the knobs and allowing the water to run, she leaned against the bath tub and continued much on her banana before a look of realization dawned on her. Looking down at Keitaro's limp form she put her index finger to her lips and looked thoughtful for a moment before she grinned and shouted, "I forgot my toys!" With that said she once again leapt over Keitaro and ran back out of the bathroom, completely oblivious to his presence.

"Ugh," Keitaro moaned as he finally awoke and clutched his head and chin stroking both gently. "I feel like I just got shot out of a cannon and into a lamp post," Keitaro griped as he tried to correct himself. 'What a crazy dream,' he thought as noticed that he had some how gotten out of the tub.

'Weird,' Keitaro thought as he climbed into the tub once again and began to wash off some more dirt from his body. Just then the foreign looking young woman bounced into the bathroom once again, this time with a varying assortment of gadgets and gizmos. "What the?" Keitaro started as his eyes went wide with panic noticing that the girl had finally noticed him.

"Hey! You want to take a bath with me? Well okies, but now you gotta let me play with you," the young woman stated as she jumped into the tub and splashed water everywhere. Before Keitaro could even raise his voice in protest one of the young woman's devices bang to glow a neon blue and suddenly and electric current surged through the water.

"RAGH!" Keitaro shouted as he was jettisoned out of the tub and through the roof. After a moment he crashed straight back down and went through the tub. 'Today has not been my day,' Keitaro thought to himself, 'And when the heck did this become an all girls dormitory!?' However Keitaro's mental musings were cut short as he landed in the grand hall with a thud in front of an older woman wearing a chefs apron, and a blue military uniform with silver trim. Her hair was dark brown and short, her face slender and her eyes were a deep brown similar to Keitaros'.

"Hey there nephew, when did you get in?" the woman questioned as she helped a chard and slightly singed Keitaro to his feet and covered him with her apron.

After a moment of looking catatonic Keitaro finally snapped himself out of it as he shook his head violently and gazed at his aunt with tears in his eyes. "Aunt Haruka!" Keitaro shouted as he leapt to hug the older woman only to be smashed a top his head by her paper fan.

"Don't call me aunt," Haruka reprimanded as she put her fan up and gazed down at Keitaro's crumpled form. "So, why are you here?" Haruka questioned as she sat down on the love seat, avoiding the mud.

"Didn't grandma call me to come here?" Keitaro asked as he slowly got up, once again clutching his head in pain.

"She did huh?" Haruka stated in a deadpan tone of voice although her facial expression was much different.

"Yeah, she said she had something to tell me," Keitaro stated as he took a seat on a red silk sofa adjacent from Haruka. "So I guess you don't know why she called me, huh?" Keitaro asked, his expression slightly crestfallen.

"HEY THERE'S THE PERVERT!" a familiar voice shouted as a group of four femme fatales charged down the stair case and descended on the quivering Keitaro. Naru had changed out of her towel into a yellow turtle neck sweater, red khaki skirt, black knee high socks, and brown leather shoes. Kitsune was currently donning a light blue turtle neck sweater, and tan khaki pants.

"Hey girls, well it seems you've already met my nephew," Haruka stated as she fished a cigarette out of the front breast pocket of her uniform and put it to her lips.

"NEPHEW!" both Naru, Kitsune, and the rave haired young woman cried out in unison. Meanwhile the foreign looking young woman had preoccupied herself with yet another banana, and was merrily munching away completely oblivious to the scene unfolding.

"Yep, Urashima Keitaro. My nephew and Hina's grandson," Haruka stated as she pulled out a sterling silver lighter with a cross engraved on it. She clicked the lighter a few times before a dull flame erupted from the spout, she then gingerly lit her cigarette and snapped the lighter shut before putting it back in her pant pocket. Taking a nice long drag before breathing out a thick cloud of smoke from her nostrils Haruka once again began her interrogation. "So what have you been up to these days?" Haruka asked as she ran a hand over her uniform trying to rub out some of the wrinkles.

"Nothing much I guess, but do you think I could answer your questions after I put my cloths back on? They should be finished washing by now," Keitaro stated as he gazed at his aunt with pleading eyes.

"Alright, fine. Hey Motoko go get his glasses, I'm sure there still in the bathroom on what's left of the tub," Haruka demanded as she turned her head toward the direction of the raven haired young woman.

"Yes ma'am," Motoko stated with what seemed to be a forced bow due to the fact that she looked so ridged.

"Alright, I'll show you down to the laundry room. Come with me," Haruka stated as she helped her nephew to his feet and passed by a stunned Kitsune and Naru, who simply watched them go by.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After Keitaro was properly clothed and his glasses returned he and his aunt took similar positions and began their talk with the girls present.

"Well let's see," Keitaro started as he cupped his chin and a thoughtful looked etched it's way onto his face, "I guess the most important thing would be the fact that I finally passed the exam and became a State Alchemist." Upon hearing this the whole room erupted into a frenzy of questions and indignant cries.

"No way! You're an alchemist!? A pervert like you!?" Naru stated with a look of shock and disbelief plastered on her face. "I won't believe it!" Naru cried out indignantly as she glared at Keitaro and folded her arms over her chest haughtily.

"Wow! And with Hina-san as your grandmother you must be plenty rich!" Kitsune stated as she licked her lips in contemplation and grinned from ear to ear. 'I think I just hit the jackpot!' Kitsune thought to herself as she continued to eye Keitaro like he was a slab of meat.

"How can one who is so dishonorable become a State Alchemist?" Motoko mumbled to herself as she stared at Keitaro in disbelief, her mouth hanging slightly agape.

"What's an Alchemist?" the young foreign girl started as she put her index finger to her mouth again, "Does it taste good?"

"Well you see the thing is," Keitaro started sheepishly as he scratched the back of his head gingerly.

"Dinner's ready everyone!" the voice of a young woman exclaimed causing everyone to stare in the direction of the kitchen which was down the corridor to the left.

"Well Keitaro looks like you'll have to finish your explanations later, soups on," Haruka stated as she scooped the young foreign girl onto her shoulders, "Well come on Su, lets get you fed before you start eating the upholstery again."

With that everyone followed behind toward the dining room, some feeling guilty, others either angry or confused, and some even plotting away deviously.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Keitaro I would like to introduce you to the Tresembol Manor's youngest tenant Mahera Shinobu. Shinobu this is my nephew Keitaro," Haruka stated in deadpan tone of voice as she eased into her seat and lit another cigarette.

"Hello Urashima-sempai, you wouldn't mind if I called you sempai would you?" a young woman wearing an apron greeted as a small blush found its way upon her cheeks. Shinobu was currently wearing a read blazer, red plaid skirt, a red vest, a fresh white dress-shirt, and knee high white socks. She had an extremely innocent and cute face which was enhanced by her large navy blue orbs and acrylic blue hair.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Shinobu, and of course not I would be honored! Did you cook all of this food?" Keitaro questioned as he looked at the spread laid out in front of him, "It all looks so good!" It was true, there were at least three different kinds of roast bird ranging from chicken to duck to quail. There was also an assortment of various vegetables ranging from corn on the cob, to mashed potatoes, squash, and even baked pumpkin. Not to mention the various fine wines, and rums strewn about the table.

Shinobu simply nodded in response as she blushed even more and took her seat at the table.

"Well it looks like our little Shinobu has a little crush," Kitsune jabbed causing Shinobu to blush an even darker shade of crimson.

"What are you talking about Kitsune?" Shinobu questioned sheepishly as she looked down at her plate trying to avoid looking directly into the older woman's eyes.

"Hey it's not like I could blame you, I mean he is pretty cute and he's also a State Alchemist," Kitsune stated as she grabbed a bottle of rum off of the table and poured herself a glass. "While sake is all well and good, you can't beat a good bottle of rum," Kitsune said aloud to herself as she downed the contents within her glass in one gulp.

"A State Alchemist?" Shinobu questioned in disbelief as she stared at Keitaro who was consuming his meal with gusto. 'Wow, he must be really strong and he'd probably make a good husband,' Shinobu thought as she blushed a deep crimson and immediately began mentally chastising herself, 'Wait what am I thinking!? I'm way too young for him, he must be at least 19, but then again I am 13 so there really isn't that big an age gap is there? Auuuu, I need to stop thinking like this.' However she felt she should ask him at least a few questions, after all she did want to get to know him a bit better.

"Um, Urashima-sempai if you don't mind could I ask you a few questions?" Shinobu inquired shyly as she blushed slightly when Keitaro looked up from his plate was a sincere smile on his face.

"Sure Shinobu, ask away!" Keitaro exclaimed as he set down his fork and gave Shinobu his undivided attention.

"Well my first question is how old are you?" Shinobu stated as all the eyes at the table, aside from Su's, fell on her causing her to feel exceedingly nervous.

"Well I just turned twenty a few months ago," Keitaro stated as he continued to smile at Shinobu causing the young girl's heart to flutter with excitement.

"Oh, okay," Shinobu stated as she looked down at her plate again, "Well, um, is it true that you're a State Alchemist?"

"Kinda," Keitaro stated with a nervous chuckle as he fished a silver pocket watch out of his breast pocket. The watch was embroidered with a extravagant lion emblem which symbolized the status of State Alchemist. "I mean technically they never revoked my license so I guess I could be considered a State Alchemist," Keitaro said as he tucked the watch back into his breast pocket.

"What do you mean kinda!" Naru squawked indignantly, "Either you are or you aren't!" Everyone at the table, including Haruka, had to agree. I didn't make any sense for someone to "kinda" be a State Alchemist.

"Well it's complicated," Keitaro started as he looked down at his plate, "The thing is this…they told me if I gave up my foolish quest they would be honored for me to be their State Alchemist once again. Unfortunately I refused to give up my search, because I made a promise years ago…a promise to my sister."

"I still don't understand," Haruka stated with a look of puzzlement on her face as she took a drag on her cigarette and blew the smoke out of her nose once again, "What does Kanako have to do with all of this?"

"The Philosopher's Stone," was all Keitaro said still looking at his plate as he heard a glass shatter on the floor.

"Are you out of your mind!" Haruka snapped as she jumped over the table and grabbed the young man by his collar and lifted him up out of his chair. "Is that why your parents kicked you out of the house!? Are you so dense!?" Haruka hollered, her arms shaking violently as tears formed in the corner of her eyes, "Do you even know what it is you seek to find!? Can you even understand the endless amount of sacrifices it will take for you to gain that kind of power!?"

"No I don't, and I thought you said you didn't know why I came here," Keitaro stated in a deadpan tone of voice as he looked down at his aunt. There was no hint of fear or terror in his eyes, only emptiness.

Haruka felt herself grow stupefied for a moment as she simply stared at him with her mouth agape. However she quickly regained her composure and glared daggers into Keitaro. "No listen here nephew, I love you but I'll be damned if I allow you to go through with this crazy plan of yours," Haruka stated through clenched teeth. "How the hell did you even find out about the Stone?" Haruka questioned as she started sit the young man back down into his seat.

"Grandma told me about it," Keitaro said as he grabbed a bottle of champagne and poured himself a glass.

"She wah?" Haruka questioned as her mouth hung agape and she simply stared at him as he sipped his champagne.

"Tell me something Au…Haruka-san," Keitaro stated as he set down his glass, "What is it about this stone that makes it so forbidden?" To his statement Haruka could only stare at him as her face went pale and a sudden chill passed through her body. How could she explain to him what she had seen that day? How could she tell him when she was forbidden to? The answer was an easy one…she could do nothing to save this poor young man's soul. The Stone had already ensnared his soul and there was nothing she could do but watch him find the truth for himself, that is if he even got that lucky.

"I'm sorry nephew, but that' is restricted information, top secret," Haruka stated in a deadpan tone of voice as she raised a shaking hand to her mouth along with her cigarette. Putting what was left to her lips she took a nice long drag before she sighed and added, "This is a fools quest that you're on nephew, I suggest you head back home to your parents and forget that you ever heard about such an artifact."

"I'm sorry, but I just can't," Keitaro started as he got up from the table, "I made two promises, and until I keep this one I cannot keep the other." With that said he started to walk toward the door but stopped briefly and added, "Don't worry, as soon as I find out what grandma called me here for I'll be gone. You don't have to worry about what other people will think." With that said Keitaro exited the dining room leaving behind some very confused and upset young women.

After a moment Haruka slammed her fist on the table causing the silver ware and plates to jump about an inch in the air. "That idiot!" she snapped as she began to shake furiously.

"Haruka-san I'm sorry, I didn't know," Shinobu started nervously but Haruka put a hand up to silence the distraught young woman.

"It wasn't your fault Shinobu, don't worry about it," Haruka stated as she looked up towards the door. "That fool is going to be digging his own grave, he just doesn't know it yet," Haruka muttered to herself as she walked through the dining room doors and down the corridor. A few seconds later a loud slam could be heard signaling that Haruka had left the building and was more than likely heading back down toward the café.

"Well that certainly was unexpected," Kitsune stated as she sipped at another glass of rum.

"I'll say," Naru stated in agreement as she recovered from the shock of the scene that had just played out before her eyes.

**The Next Day**

"Knock" "Knock". Keitaro awoke to the sound of someone knocking on the door in the grand hall. "Sorry but I'm too tired to get up and get that," Keitaro stated as he rolled over in his bed and went back to sleep. A few minutes later he heard a gentle knocking on his door and decided he might as well get up at this point. After slipping on a pair of pants he slid out of bed and headed toward the door. Upon opening it he came face to face with a madly blushing Shinobu.

"Sorry to disturb you Urashima-sempai but this letter seemed really urgent," Shinobu stated as she reached from behind her back and showed Keitaro a letter with large "URGENT" stamp on the front of the envelope.

'Wow,' Keitaro thought to himself, 'That's some crazy insight she has.' Keitaro thanked Shinobu and bowed politely before he told her that he would like to get a little more sleep before he decided on his next course of action. As soon as he heard foot steps disappear down the hall Keitaro ripped open the letter and began to read it frantically.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

_Dear grandson,_

_I hope this letter finds you in good health. I hear you've been excommunicated from your position of State Alchemist by the state of Oishi. That is most unfortunate, but I'm sure it had something to do with you wishing to search for the Philosopher's Stone. Well in that regard I have something very important to tell you. An old friend of mine has told me that the new Tresembol governor, Rupert Michelle, has come into some type of amazing power. It's said that he even has the power by which to bring resurrect the dead. I'm not sure if you should investigate due to the fact that it might be a bunch of nonsense, however I figured it might be of some use to you. Anyway, sorry for my absence but I decided to go on vacation for awhile, you know what I mean. I'm sure the girls gave you a nice welcome anyway, and if not I doubt that you'll be staying long anyway once you investigate this if you in fact chose to do so. Well that about sums it up, I love you and good speed grandson._

_Love, _

_Granny Hinata_

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

"Thanks grandma, and I'm definitely going to check this out," Keitaro said to himself as he folded the letter and tucked it into his left pant pocket. "Well better grab a bite and head out," Keitaro stated as he did a few stretches and finished putting on the outfit he had worn yesterday.

"Well at least now I've got a lead," Keitaro said to himself as he headed down the hall. Unfortunately due to his mental musings Keitaro didn't notice the banana peel lying on the floor as he accidentally stepped on it and slid down the hall. "Whoa!" Keitaro cried out as he closed his eyes and cringed. Suddenly he smacked into something or someone knocking them both down onto the ground, and upon opeinging his eyes he came face to face with the girl know as Motoko. Fortunately for him it appeared that she was unconscious. In fact this was really good due to the fact that he found himself in a compromising position, that is to say that his hands had somehow found their way directly onto Motoko's two soft mounds.

'Man that was close,' Keitaro thought as he breathed a sigh of relief and removed his hands from the forbidden zone. Unfortunately he had already been seen, and by the worse possible person.

"PERVERT!" was the loud battle cry that rang through the Tresembol Manor followed by a loud smack and the sound of walls being destroyed.

**2 Hours Later at the Breakfast Table**

"So what you mean to say is that the ex-State Alchemist tried to rape me?" Motoko questioned as she glared at Keitaro. Her sword was currently unsheathed and she looked poised to attack at a moments notice.

"Yep, that's exactly what I'm saying," Naru stated with a smug smile evident on her lips, "Don't worry though, I got him so he shouldn't be acting up for awhile."

"Whatever," Keitaro mumbled to himself as he nursed his sore chin and finished his breakfast. "Tell you what, you're never going to have to worry about me again by tomorrow morning, okay?" Keitaro stated as he finished his glass of orange juice and got up from that table.

"Why is that Urashima-sempai?" Shinobu questioned, tears evident in her eyes, "Is it that you don't like, or is it the food, or is it…"

"No, no, of course not Shinobu. You're great, it's just that once I check out this lead I'll have to get going again. Trust me, it's nothing personal I just have to go," Keitaro stated trying to placate the distraught young woman. It seemed to work due to the fact that Shinobu stopped tearing up and she simply nodded in response.

"Well what kinda lead are ya' goin' off of?" Kitsune questioned as she took a sip out of her glass of sake.

"That's a secret," Keitaro stated as he pushed his glasses back onto his face and headed out the door.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So this is the new capital, huh?" Keitaro questioned as he looked up toward a structure that looked strangely reminiscent of Notre Dame. "What happened to separation of church and state?" Keitaro questioned as he shuffled into the capital building and noticed that it was full of overly religious overtones. In fact it looked more like a church than any kind of political building.

"Well one might say that a state is only as powerful as its devotion to God," the voice of an older man stated from behind Keitaro. Turning around Keitaro came face to face with a man who looked to be around his mid-forties. He was a muscular man with large broad features and incredible mass. It almost looked as though he was lifting weights at every possible second of free time he had. Combined with the fact that it looked like he was poured into his navy blue pen stripe suit, white vest, and navy blue dress shirt, he cut a rather imposing figure. In fact his face looked like it was almost as muscular as his body and his low brow ridges and long black hair made him look almost like a Neanderthal.

"Right, so are you a priest or a governor, because I'm only here to see the governor if you don't mind sir," Keitaro stated with respect evident in his voice.

"Ah, I see you don't waste any time beating around the bush or with small talk," Rupert stated as he walked around Keitaro and up toward the statue of some saint that Keitaro couldn't quite name. "Well what is it you came here for my boy, you must know that I'm a very busy man," the mayor stated as he lit a candle, crouched onto his knees, and prayed silently at the alter.

"I've come here to inquire about your Philosopher's Stone," Keitaro stated with a hint of hesitation in his voice, "That is if you don't mind sir." Keitaro waited a moment as the man continued to pray in silence.

After a moment the man broke the stiffening silence by saying, "God works in mysterious ways, does he not?"

"I wouldn't know," Keitaro stated with a shrug, "God and I haven't talked for awhile so I really wouldn't know."

"Ah, so you are a non-believer are you?" the man questioned as he slowly rose from off of his knees.

"I wouldn't say that I was a non-believer per-say, it's just that I want more proof then some scriptures written by man. If anything obtaining the Stone will be enough proof for me, but until then I really don't know what I believe," Keitaro stated with a shrug once again.

"Why are the scriptures not enough for you my brother?" Rupert asked as he turned to face Keitaro was a looked of confusion evident on his face.

"Because man is imperfect, man lies, and man misinterprets things and views the world by his own selfish desires. In fact listen to me right now, everything is about man, you notice that women are always excluded, but without women men would be nothing. You know only a hand full of men a truly necessary to continue our species, but without several women we would be nothing. Like I said even if religion was influenced by God it was not he himself who wrote it so how can we be sure that we have the truth?" Keitaro questioned as he walked down the isle towards the alter. "No, I refuse to believe that the word of man is the word of a god. That does not mean however that god does not exist, but as far as his relationship to me…well that might not exist," Keitaro added as he stood about nine meters away from Rupert.

"You are quite well spoken my boy. I'm rather surprised, you are not at all like the dolt I heard you were," Rupert stated with a chuckle, "And yes Mr. Urashima, your reputation does precede you.

"Well I wouldn't say all of that, but thanks for the compliments" Keitaro stated sheepishly as he scratched the nape of his neck nervously, "I mean I did fail the exam three times in a row, so I hope I would have gotten at least a little more intelligent my last time around."

"Well I must say that I agree, so what is it you came here for? Oh yes that stone," Rupert stated. "Well if you wish to see it then follow me for I shall prove to you the existence of God," with that said Rupert turned and walked toward a stone spiral staircase. Keitaro followed suit and soon both men were headed down stairs toward the basement of the building.

"We're almost there," Rupert stated with a smile evident in his voice.

"Right," Keitaro stated with a nodded as the spiral stair case ended and they walked into a room lit by candle light from various angles. Keitaro couldn't determine if it was the light from candles that was blue or the water from the labyrinth that they were currently in. Looking around Keitaro noted that they were entirely surrounded by lakes worth of water as they sat in the middle of some large estranged pathway that led to an alter in the center of the lake. Keitaro also took note of the several large stone pillars that seemed to be holding up the structure above them.

"So what do you think my brother? What do you think of my hovering capital? A work of God, wouldn't you say?" Rupert asked as they drew closer to the smaller temple within the temple.

"I'm sorry sir, but I would have to go with man on this one," Keitaro stated with a shrug once again.

"I suppose you're right," Rupert stated with a smile as he turned to face Keitaro, the blue light shining off of his face.

After a few more minutes of walking they finally reached the alter and atop it sat a glowing blood red stone.

"Well what do you think my boy?" Rupert asked as he gazed proudly at the stone that sat atop the alter. The stone contrasted sharply with the blue marble that surrounded it on either side, but this only stood to make it look even more beautiful.

"So that's it?" Keitaro questioned with a look of awe on his face before his lips curled into a smile. "Do you mind if I use it just this once?" Keitaro asked as he looked toward Rupert who simply smiled and nodded. 'Looks like I'll be able to keep my promise after all Kanako,' Keitaro thought to himself as he approached the alter. "Finally, I can keep my promises," Keitaro stated as he reached out for the stone. Suddenly he heard a clicking sound from behind him and a loud clank. Whipping around he saw Rupert standing on the other side of metal gate with a wicked smile on his face.

"What are you doing!?" Keitaro snapped as he glared at Rupert who started to laugh manically.

"My boy, do you honestly think that I would allow the power of God to fall into the hands of a fool like you?" Rupert questioned, all the while with a sinister smile plastered on his misshapen face. Reaching in his pocket Rupert retrieved and object that looked strangely enough like the stone that was supposed to be sitting atop the alter.

"Wha?" Keitaro questioned as he stared on in disbelief.

"Have fun with the fake my boy, maybe if you're lucky you'll be able to knock out one of my chimeras with it!" Rupert stated as he began to laugh manically again and walked off leaving Keitaro to his fate.

"Why that rotten," Keitaro started but stopped as soon as he heard the low breathing of a beast that he never wanted to face again, let alone multiples of them. Whipping around Keitaro came face to face with three chimeras that looked ready to tear him apart, limb from limb.

"Things just keep getting better and better," Keitaro stated sourly as he clapped his hand together and they began glowing a vibrant neon green. "Sorry, but I can't die here. Not that you should have to either, but if you come at me I'll have no choice but to defeat you," Keitaro stated as a spear appeared to be coming out the center of his hands. As he continued to part his hands the spear began to take its full shape, and by the end Keitaro held and spear that looked almost identical to that of Kan-U Unchio dragon embroidery and all.

"RAWR!" the beast cried out uniformly as they charged Keitaro ready to tear him apart. Keitaro nimbly avoid the first two by ducking underneath them, unfortunately the last one was onto his ploy and dove directly at him tackling him to the ground. Rearing back its head it prepared to deliver the final blow by ripping Keitaro's head from his shoulders. Unfortunately the only thing it got a bite of was the shaft of Keitaro's spear as he forced the beast off of him by fusing his chi with the spear and using the energy to force the beast off. Once he had thrown the beast off of him Keitaro swiftly moved in a drove the spear through the beast heart. "Sorry, but this is what you chose," Keitaro stated as the staff began to glow a neon green and the beast crumbled into dust. Now left with two beasts to fend off, Keitaro waited for them to strike out before he would counter.

The one on the left was the first to leap out at Keitaro he simply side stepped. Unfortunately the second one took this time to attack and ended up swiping Keitaro across his chest leaving five large red scars running down his chest. "Damn," Keitaro hissed as he back flipped over the next swipe and landed awkwardly on his feet and hands. 'I've got to end this now,' Keitaro thought to himself as he brought his spear up into a defensive stance. As he did so both chimeras decided to attack simultaneously, unfortunately for them Keitaro was ready. His hands began glowing a neon green once again and he threw his spear at this aggressors only to have it shatter into a thousand tiny needles that tore through the beast vital points causing them to drop dead in mid air and land on the ground with an audible thud.

"Wow, now even I'm tired," Keitaro admitted as things started to fade in and out of focus. The last thing he heard before he passed out was the sound of the gate opening.

**To Be Continued**

**Next Episode: Showdown with Rupert**

**Author's Note: Okay like I said, for those of you who are still reading ****A Royal Pain?**** I will be updating sooner rather than later, but right now I've got to get some more ideas for the next chapter. As far as this story is concerned however, well this is going to be a long one kiddies and I mean really long so long I might have to take some breaks in between it's going to be so long. But that's beside the point, what is the point is this: For those of you saying that some of the characters are too OOC well guess what….who cares, if you've read this far I assume that you enjoyed it instead of simply saying, well this is crossover crap and then telling me it sux (and if it does please tell me, your reviews will probably be hilarious and I don't have a problem laughing at myself). Of course I will try to keep everyone relatively in character, but I also want to be loose at points for plot development. Okay, AS AWLAYS PLEAE REVIEW AND I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS FIRST CHAPTER! ******


	2. Showdown with Rupert

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or Love Hina, so please don't bang on my door at three o'clock in the morning trying to sue the very pants off of me.

Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who reviewed, flamed, or whatever!

**The Philosophy Behind Lies**

**Episode 2: Showdown with Rupert**

"Ugh," Keitaro moaned as he slowly opened his eyes and allowed a pale blue light to filter in through his irises. "Whatever happened apparently doesn't matter because I'm still alive," Keitaro said to himself as he tried to push himself off of the slick freezing cold limestone that he was currently sprawled across. As he pushed his body up his forearms suddenly buckled sending him smacking back onto the rock beneath him. "Owww," Keitaro moaned as he cringed in pain, "I'm just too tired to move." Suddenly an image of a red jewel flashed in front of his mind's eye. "The Philosopher's Stone!" Keitaro cried out, and with an amazing surge of newly found power he forced himself to rise shakily to his feet.

Looking around Keitaro noted the two dead chimera and recalled the battle that had ensued only moments ago. As he continued to look at their crumpled forms, the pale blue light enshrouding them in an ethereal glow, Keitaro felt a pang of sorrow in his chest. "With my luck you all were probably once human, although even if you weren't no one and nothing deserves to die like you did," Keitaro stated to no one before a he gave polite bow to the fallen beast. He then recalled the slash marks on his chest and looked down to find that they had vanished leaving only shredded clothing and a light scar in their memory.

"Why am I not surprised?" Keitaro groused to himself as he chuckled and shook his head as if in disgust. "I don't have time to be thinking about this," Keitaro stated as he looked up toward the alter and the blood red orb placed a top it. 'So it's a fake huh?' Keitaro thought to himself as a frown found its way to his lips, 'And that primate looking overly religious dogmatic son of a…whatever, now all I have to do is find him and take his stone!'

"So you're still searching for it, are you big brother?" a faint feminine voice, possibly that of a little girl, chimed in from behind Keitaro.

'It can't be!' Keitaro thought as his eyes went wide in shock.

"Well aren't you going to turn around and look at me big brother?" the small voice inquired with a light chuckle.

Whipping around Keitaro came face to face with someone he never thought he'd see again. Tears started to form in the corners of his eyes and his knees buckled beneath him as he gazed at the little girl in front of him. Currently donning a pale blue sundress that she had worn several years ago, her hair still with its long bangs and tied into a small ponytail in the back, and her lips curled in to a familiar girlish smirk stood Kananko Urashima.

"K-K-K-Kanako? Is that really you?" Keitaro inquired too afraid to move and have what might be an illusion disappear and leave him all alone in the dim candle lit room. Soon tears started to flow unabated from his eyes and his mouth began to quiver violently.

"Don't give up big brother, I still believe you can do it. After all, you're my big brother and I know you'll keep your promise," the little girl stated with a feather light giggle, "Get up brother and keep your promises." With that said the little girl faded from Keitaro's vision, much like the apparition Keitaro had feared her being.

"Kanako!" Keitaro cried out as he shot up from off of his knees and dashed toward the entrance where the young girl had once stood. Tears were streaming down his face as he frantically looked for any trace of the young woman, only to come up with nothing in the end. Uncharacteristically frustrated, Keitaro fell to his knees and began to slam the limestone with his fist. "Damn it!" Keitaro cried out as he continued to pound the stone causing it to begin to crack and his knuckles to ache. "I'll get that stone no matter what the cost," Keitaro stated through gritted teeth as he rose to his feet once again and walked out the entrance of the temple and toward the spiral staircase.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Back on the streets of Tresembol, Keitaro began his long trek home so that he could recuperate. As he walked along the street he noted that today was actually a great day. The sun shown brightly, but did not serve to overheat the streets. There was a gentle breeze blowing as well which caused Keitaro's sweat drenched dark brown hair to whip around his face, drying it somewhat. The cobblestone streets, black lamppost, and the red and white brick houses that adorned the streets also looked somehow nostalgic, like something you would see on some type of post card stating "Wish You Were Here!" In fact if it hadn't been for the men, women, and children staring at him as though he were some type of space anomaly he might have felt extremely peaceful at the moment.

After a few minutes of walking Keitaro felt a quivering in his stomach and then heard a low growl. "Guess I must be hungry after that ordeal," Keitaro stated numbly to himself as he stopped and looked around for a nearby grocer. After a minute of looking he noticed a small one tucked in between to large apartment buildings. It looked simple enough, red brick, blue tile roof with a small red brick chimney, and a stand of various fruits both common and exotic outside the store inside wooden bins.

'A piece of fruit might actually be really good right about now,' Keitaro thought to himself as he licked his lips hungrily. 'Better make sure I've got enough money first however,' Keitaro stated as he checked his breast pocket for his wallet. After a minute of fishing around past his watch and a couple of pieces of chalk Keitaro found his estranged wallet. "Ha, there we go," he stated happily as he pulled out a slightly frayed brown leather wallet. Unfolding it and checking inside Keitaro was surprised to find out that he only had enough to buy a piece of fruit and maybe a donut from the bakery not too far down the street.

"Today has seriously not been my day," Keitaro groused to himself as he walked up to the stand and selected a bright red apple from out of the wooden box that several others sat in. Walking into the shop Keitaro set the money down on the wooden counter in front of a sleeping clerk. "No point in waking him up I guess," Keitaro mumbled to himself with a shrug as he turned and walked out the door back onto the streets. "Okay, now for that donut!" Keitaro stated cheerily as he walked down the street toward the bakery.

As he made his way toward the bakery Keitaro couldn't help but notice that various people were either glaring at him or looking at him with a weary look in their eyes. "What's going on?" Keitaro asked no one in particular. Suddenly a cute little girl with long flowing blond hair wearing a blue private school uniform ran up to him and asked, "Hey! Are you the heretic?"

"Am I the what!?" Keitaro exclaimed as his eyes went wide with shock.

"Are you the heretic the mayor has been telling everyone about today?" the little girl inquired once again as she raised an eyebrow in confusion as she pointed behind Keitaro, "I mean you look just like the guy on the poster over there." Turing around looking in the direction indicated by the girl's index finger Keitaro turned to face the brick wall behind him that featured an unflattering poster of himself. In the picture Keitaro had been caught with his swimming trunks down and a crab pinching his sun burnt rear end as he cried out in pain.

"How the heck!" Keitaro cried out as he snatched the poster off of the wall and furiously tore it to shreds. 'How the heck did they get that picture?' Keitaro wondered to himself as he furrowed his brow in confusion, 'I mean I only went to the beach one time and that was almost three years ago!'

"Well are ya'?" the little girl asked for a third time snapping Keitaro out of his revelry as she gazed into his chocolate brown orbs, hers being a deep vibrant shade of teal.

"Well it's complicated to tell you the truth, but no I'm not a heretic so to speak," Keitaro stated nervously as he sheepishly scratched the nape of his neck. "I don't suppose that you would happen to know where the mayor is by any chance, would you ? I would like to understand why he's doing this," Keitaro added as he took a bite of his apple.

"Sure, just follow me," the little girl stated with a grin as she grabbed Keitaro's hand and dragged him through the streets, past several confused bystanders.

"Um, if I'm a heretic wont you get in trouble for helping me? I mean it would've been a lot easier if you just told me. Plus running around with a little girl might make me look like a heretic and a pedophile?" Keitaro asked the little girl as a look of puzzlement found its way onto his face.

"Nah, I'm not really worried about it because we're gonna be leaving town in a little while To answer you're last question, well who cares? If we get stopped I'll just say you're my cousin from out of town," the little girl stated with a giggle.

"Why are you moving?" Keitaro asked between bites of his apple as he allowed the girl to lead him down various dark and dank alleyways and back out onto to the streets.

"My dad just became the new State Alchemist in Reutuma, and we're going to be leaving in a few hours, so I don't mind helping you out even if you are a heretic. Besides, it's not like I believe the word of some ugly old mayor, I mean I just get this feeling like you're really trustworthy and gentle," the young woman said as she lead Keitaro down another alley. However she soon felt an enormous weight coming crashing down from behind herself and her legs flew out from under her causing her to rear end to slam down painfully on the stone street. Looking behind her as she winced and a rubbed her sore rear end she noticed that Keitaro had fallen on his face and was struggling to move.

"Sorry, guess I'm more tired then I thought," Keitaro apologized sheepishly as he chuckled nervously.

The young woman looked at him with a look of disbelief plastered on her face before she simply chuckled and shook her head. "Well I guess we'll have to wait to go and see the mayor, just don't wait to long otherwise I'll be gone before I get to show you his secret hideaway," the little girl stated with a smile as she helped Keitaro to his feet as he braced himself against the wall of the alleyway.

"Okay, I'll just take a quick nap back at my place and then you can show me where the mayor is staying at," Keitaro stated as he limped down the alleyway and back out onto the sidewalk.

"Sure, just tell me where you're staying at and I'll help you get there," the little girl stated as she guided Keitaro down the street.

"Wait, I didn't mean for you to come with me! What will people think? And on top of that you just met me!" Keitaro cried out indignantly as eyes went wide and his arms fanned out wildly.

The little girl chuckled into her hand before she responded, "Like I just told you, I don't know why but I feel like I can trust you. And when I get these feelings (don't even think she's going to say she needs sexual healing, 'kay!?) I don't tend to doubt them."

Keitaro regarded the girl with a hard look full of skepticism in his eyes before his face softened and he smiled and gave her his trademark goofy grin. "Okay, but at least tell me you name," Keitaro said as they resumed walking.

"My name is Evangeline A.K. McDowell," the little girl responded with a cute smile and a giggle, "And what's your name, if you don't mind me asking."

"Not at all," Keitaro responded with a smile of his own, "My name is Keitaro Urashima."

"Well it's nice to meet you Mr. Urashima!" Evangeline stated as they walked past a familiar run down looking café.

"Same here Ms. McDowell, but what do you say we stop for a bite to eat?" Keitaro inquired as the stopped in front of the café's decrypted oak wood doors.

"At this place!?" Evangeline cried out indignantly as she pointed vehemently at the building with a look of disgust on her face. "It looks like there'll be rats running all over the place!"

Keitaro chuckled nervously and thought, 'Well that's Aunt Haruka for ya'. Never wants anymore new customers besides the ones she already has, and on top of that she's really cheap. I wonder if she learned to be that way because of the military.'

"Hey, who's the ugly old lady walking around in there. She looks kind of like a soldier with that uniform on," Evangeline stated as she peered into the cafe through a small crack in the door.

"Oh hell!" Keitaro said as soon as he heard Evangeline call Haruka an old lady. 'Maybe she'll spare her because she's a kid,' Keitaro thought to himself with another nervous chuckle.

"What was that!" shouted a enraged, but still slightly deadpan, voice with caused the foundations of the café to shake and quiver.

"Whoa!" Evangeline said quickly recoiling and running behind Keitaro for protection. "Help Mr. Urashima, I think she's going to kill me!" Evangeline cried as she gripped Keitaro's legs as though her life depended on it. Suddenly the shabby oak wood doors were flung from their hinges and out onto the street as Haruka kick them and stepped out of the shop glowing red due to an insane amount of ki swirling around her.

"How said it!" she snapped as she eyed the only two people on the street. "I already know it wasn't you, unless you suddenly reverted back to childhood and decided you wanted to start over as a girl. So where the hell is she!" Haruka snapped as she stomped over to Keitaro, cracking and destroying the cobblestone beneath her feet.

"Now, now, Aun…Haruka!" Keitaro quickly recovered fearing what she might do to him in her enraged state if he accidentally called her aunt. "Let's just be rational about this, I mean she is a little girl after all," Keitaro said as he put reached behind himself and gripped Evangeline's shoulders comfortingly, "On top of that…" Keitaro knew he was going to be a dead man after saying what he was about to say, but better him then his new found companion he rationalized. "It's not like you're that young anymore."

"WHAM!" There was a shrill cry from Evangeline as Keitaro was knocked clear through a brick wall adjacent from the café.

"You crazy old bat you just killed your own nephew!" Evangeline cried as she ran over and began to throw small pieces of debris and whole brick off of the injured Keitaro. "Keitaro are you okay!?" Evangeline cried out desperately as she shook the young man ever so slightly trying to jar a response out of him. "Keitaro!" she cried out even more desperately as tears started to form in the corner of her eyes. She had never seen, what she perceived as, someone dying before. What made it even more difficult was, despite the fact that she had just met him, the fact that she had already started to like Keitaro for a reason she couldn't explain.

"Ooooh," Keitaro moaned as he clutched his head in pain, "That's going to leave a nasty mark."

"Keitaro!" Evangeline cried excitedly as she hugged the young man hard enough to make a few bones crack.

"Owww," Keitaro moaned before he chuckled nervously and said, "Word of advice, don't ever call her crazy, old, ugly, or aunt. Not that you would call her the last one anyway, but just in case."

"Okay, I won't promise! But how are you okay Keitaro, anyone else would have been dead!?" Evangeline inquired as she loosened the hug ever so slightly recognizing that she was suffocating the injured young man.

"That's a secret that I can't tell you, sorry Evangeline," Keitaro said with a hint of remorse in his voice as he slowly got onto his feet and set Evangeline down on top the brilliant green grass mixed with debris.

"Okay, as long as you're okay that's all that matters," Evangeline said with a small smile as she rubbed the tears out of the corners of her eyes.

"Hey nephew, once you and your little girlfriend are done making out why don't I treat you to a bite," Haruka stated as she climbed over what remained off the brick wall. Lighting a cigarette with her stainless steel lighter she took a long drag before blowing out the smoke and flicking the lighter shut. "Next time," Haruka said putting the cigarette in the corner of her mouth, "Let the little wench take her punishment."

"You know I could never do that Haruka," Keitaro said with smile as he looked down at a now nervous Evangeline, "I wont let anything happen to any of my friends."

Evangeline couldn't help but blush and smile upon hearing Keitaro's statement.

"Whatever, come on otherwise you're not getting anything to eat," Haruka stated as she turned around and walked back toward the café, "And you can bring your little "friend" if you want."

"Yes ma'am!" Keitaro stated as looked down toward Evangeline and said, "While it may look kinda crappy on the outside her cooking is really great, so what do you say?"

"Sure," Evangeline said as she grabbed Keitaro's hand with a blush on her cheeks and ran towards the café.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Mhmmm!" Evangeline cried in sheer ecstasy as she savored the flavors bombarding her taste buds. "This is the best roast duck ever!" she cried out as she took another fork full and jammed in into her mouth, all the while munching with gusto.

"Muhum!" Keitaro cried out in unison as the both sat across from one another at a cheap wooden table in even cheaper wooden chairs.

"Happy you all are enjoying it," Haruka said as she grabbed another screw out of her mouth and began twisting it into the hinges of the decrypted door. "So how did it go Keitaro? Did you find out anything?" Haruka inquired, her voice not betraying any emotion.

"Well if I'm correct I believe the mayor may have a Philosopher's Stone, but I'm not sure because the only one I really got a chance to see was the fake that he had placed on a pedestal in order to trap me," Keitaro said between bites.

"Is that so?" Haruka said in her usual deadpan tone of voice, although if one listened closely enough they could hear a hint of skepticism.

"Yep, now all I have to do is get the Stone from him," Keitaro said as he finished off the last of his duck and patted his full stomach.

"But why do you want this Stone? What's so special about it?" Evangeline inquired as she took a sip of her grape juice from and cheap glass.

"You said your father was an Alchemist right?" Keitaro inquired as he raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Yes, why?" Evangeline asked as she continued to sip from her grape juice with a look of confusion on her face.

"Well…" Keitaro started as he thought, 'Is my family the only one who truly knows about the Philosopher's Stone? And if so, why? Since I don't know maybe it's better not to mention this around her then.' "Never mind, it's not important, don't worry about it," Keitaro responded waving off any further questions as he got up and went around the wooden bar and grabbed a bottle of rum from off of the rack.

"Okay," Evangeline responded still slightly confused as she finished off the last of her grape juice. "If you say so Keitaro," she said as she got up and walked over to Haruka who had just finished screwing in the last bolt on the last door. "Ms. Urashima mind if I escorted Keitaro back to where he's staying?" Evangeline asked as a small blush crept across her adorable cheeks.

Haruka regarded the young woman with a look of puzzlement before she asked, "Why would you want to do something like that?"

"Well…" Evangeline started nervously, "I just figured it would make more sense for me to wait on Keitaro to finish his nap then I could take him to see the mayor again."

"And how would you know where the mayor is?" Haruka inquired as she reached into the breast pocket of her jacket and retrieved a bent cigarette which she promptly popped into her mouth. After lighting it she took a long drag and blew out the smoke as she patiently waited for the girl's response.

"…I know because he meets my mother at a their secret place at around six 'o clock every Saturday," Evangeline stated feeling completely mortified before she added, "Please don't think ill of my mother, she only did it because we were struggling with money due to the fact that it took so long for my father to become a State Alchemist."

"Don't worry about it kid, I understand completely," Haruka stated in her usual monotone as Keitaro approached, "And don't worry, I won't tell Keitaro a thing especially since he seems oblivious anyway. Go ahead and follow him back to the dorm, just don't try to jump in the sack with him."

"Thank you," Evangeline responded sheepishly as she looked down at her feet feeling her face flush due to Haruka's last comment, "And don't worry, I wont try to "jump in the sack" with him."

"So Evangeline would you like Haruka to take you back home? You wouldn't mind would you Haruka?" Keitaro inquired as he approached the two women and laid a hand on Evangeline's shoulder affectionately.

"Actually I would," Haruka responded as she took another long drag on her cigarette before she blew a cloud of smoke out of her nostrils, "Just take her back to the inn with you, don't worry I'll phone ahead and inform the girls so that they wont try to kill you as soon as you two walk through the door."

"Um, but is that okay with you Evangeline?" Keitaro inquired with a look of concern etched on his features as he raised an eyebrow in confusion, "I mean are you sure you want to go back to the dorm with me?"

"I'm sure Keitaro, plus it's easier this way," Evangeline stated with a small smile and a blush.

Keitaro smiled back at the little girl and said, "Well if you think so."

"Alright you two, get out of here before the night crowd gets in here. I can't conduct business with kids running around here," Haruka stated as she allowed the cigarette to fall on the cheap star pattern tile beneath her feet. Crushing out her cigarette by mashing it with her boot Haruka gave Keitaro a hard look and said, "Just don't be disappointed in the end."

"Huh?" Keitaro asked as a look of confusion found its way onto his face.

"Just don't be disappointed in the end," Haruka said one last time as she briskly walked past a baffled Keitaro and confused Evangeline.

"Right," Keitaro started as he looked down toward Evangeline with a smile, "Well what do you say we get going?"

Evangeline smiled and nodded as both walked out of the café and headed toward the dorm.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Pedophile Pervert!" Naru cried as she charged Keitaro who was closing the front door behind Evangeline. Naru was currently dressed in a blue and white plaid skirt, knee high black socks, white dress shirt, navy blue sweater vest, and brown leather shoes.

"Watch out!" Evangeline cried as she snatched a piece of chalk out of her blazer pocket and quickly drew out a transmutation circle. Slamming her hand down onto it caused it to glow a pale blue and soon a pale blue light shone from the floor. No sooner had it done this when a pillar of ice shot up from under Naru and sent her flying straight up into the chandelier.

"Whoa," was all Keitaro could say in response as he looked at the pillar of ice that had just come out of the ground.

"That was close," Evangeline said through gritted teeth as she wiped the sweat from her brow with the sleeve of her blazer.

"You didn't tell me you knew how to use Alchemy!" Keitaro cried out indignantly as he eyed the girl incredulously.

"Well I don't really know that much," Evangeline started nervously as she flexed her index fingers against each other, "That's about all I can really do, other than maybe transmute a few ice cubes for beverages."

"Well I'm pretty impressed!" Keitaro said as he gave Evangeline a round of applause, causing the girl to blush due to his praise.

"Thank you Keitaro but you really should take your nap right now, otherwise we're going to miss the mayor," Evangeline said as she looked Keitaro in his eyes.

"I guess you're right," Keitaro responded with a sheepish chuckle. That said they both ventured off towards the guest room where Keitaro was staying in.

Meanwhile Naru was starting to awaken from her unconscious state and she looked down from her position on the chandelier in enough time to see Keitaro and Evangeline disappear. "Hey you jerk! You can't just leave me up here!" Naru cried out indignantly but received no response. After waiting a few seconds she heard the click of door in the guest room wing and knew that he had completely ignored her. "Hey you idiot! I'm still up here! You better not be doing anything with that little girl either!" Naru snapped although no one could hear her. After a few minutes Motoko walked into the entrance hall and noticed that Naru was hanging from a chandelier. Motoko was currently donning an outfit similar to the one that she had on the other day except slightly less frayed on the edges.

"Um, not to be rude Naru-sempai, but what are you doing atop the chandelier?" Motoko inquired as she eyed Naru with a look of puzzlement on her face.

"That idiot made that little girl draw a transmutation circle that forced a pillar of ice to shot me on top of here!" Naru cried out indignantly, "Now could you please help me down?"

"Of course," Motoko stated with a nod as she bent her knees and leapt onto of the chandelier.

"You know you've really got to teach me how you do things like that," Naru stated dryly as Motoko wrapped her arms around her waist and leapt down from the chandelier.

"Practice Naru-sempai, a lot of practice," Motoko responded before she added, "Now let us go rescue this innocent little girl that Urashima has abducted."

Meanwhile Keitaro was sound a sleep on his bed and Evangeline, who was currently sitting on a chair next to a large oak desk, found herself staring at him despite the fact she continuously told herself not to. However there was just something about the man in front of her that made her feel at ease. She could sense that he was a very gentle and kind man. She even knew, from first hand experience, that he would stick his neck out for people he didn't even know.

"Keitaro," Evangeline said as a small smile found its way to her lips. "Even though I just met you there's an undeniable kindness surrounding your very being, one that I envy." With that said she got up and walked over to the bed, stripping off her jacket and hanging it over the bed post. 'Maybe if I'm close to you I can finally understand what real kindness is,' Evangeline thought as she peeled back the covers ever so slightly and climbed in the bed. She grabbed one of Keitaro's arms and draped it over her torso and sighed contentedly. "If only you could be my daddy," Evangeline said with another wistful sigh before she closed her eyes and let her own desire for sleep overtake her.

As the odd pair allowed their bodies to recuperate another distraught pair were stalking down the hall and were about to descend upon the unfortunate Keitaro.

"When I get my hands on him," Naru muttered to herself as she walked toward the door and banged on it loudly. "Hey you pervert you better not be doing anything in there!" Naru cried as she continued to slam her fist against the door.

"Excuse me Naru-sempai, but I believe I have a more effective means by which to deal with the situation," Motoko said as she gently pushed Naru aside and drew her sword, "Now listen here you vile and treacherous male! I will not allow you to defile an innocent soul by any of your perverted means! I shall slay you and remove you from this dormitory!" With that said she shouted, "Rock Splitting Sword Technique!" The door flew from it's hinges, but soon shattered into several tiny tooth picks with were collected in a wooden bin, also made from the door.

"Sorry, while I know that was intended for me you were about to hit her instead," Keitaro stated as he put a piece of chalk back into his jacket pocket. Currently dressed in a short sleeve black leather jacket with a hood, another shoulder length forest green cloak, a forest green tee-shirt, a pair of black khaki pants, and a familiar pair of black leather boots Keitaro looked somewhat more intimidating then had earlier. However this was soon detracted by the fact that he still had on his extremely large glasses and his dark brown hair was still a mess.

"What lies do you speak now you vile male?" Motoko inquired as she looked toward the bed that Keitaro was pointing at. It was then that she noticed the little girl soundly sleeping in the bed. Motoko simply stared at the girl for a moment and then at her sword. The realization dawned on her that she had in fact almost seriously injured, if not killed, the girl lying in the bed.

"Well if you ladies will excuse me I must be off," Keitaro stated as he straightened out his collar and turned to walk out the door. "If one of you wouldn't mind walking down to the café when she wakes up I would greatly appreciate it," Keitaro said as he briskly walked past the two shocked young women.

"Sure," was all that Naru could mumble in response.

"Great, she's been a great help. Be sure to tell her I said thank you when she wakes up," Keitaro stated as he continued down the hall with a small wave behind him. 'While I know that she wont like the fact that I left without her I think that it's better this way," Keitaro thought to himself as he opened the front door and walked out onto stone pathway that led to the stairs. "I might have had to actually take her with me if she hadn't mumbled the mayor's whereabouts in her sleep," Keitaro said with a smirk, "It's a good thing that that didn't happen otherwise I would have had to protect her and her mother."

Meanwhile a certain little girl within Tresembol Manor was stirring from an enjoyable nap. "Mhmm!" said moaned as she stifled a yawn and smiled a blissful smile. "I haven't had a nap that good in ages!" Evangeline stated as she stretched out her arms and legs. "Well better wake up Keitaro before we're late," she said as she turned around and reached over to wake Keitaro only to find an indentation in the bed where he had been laying.

"What?" Evangeline snapped as she shot up from the bed and looked around frantically trying to find any trace of Keitaro left in the room. Of course he was gone and she was alone.

"That jerk," Evangeline muttered as she grabbed her blazer off of the bed post and head out the door and down the hall. Upon reaching the main entrance she came face to face with Haruka.

"So you're looking for him huh?" Haruka questioned as she took a drag on her cigarette and blew out a small could of smoke, "Well the girls came down and told me that he left already, apparently you must have told him about the mayor's little rendezvous point."

"How could I do that when I was asleep?" Evangeline questioned as she furrowed her brow in confusion, "I didn't tell him anything."

"Maybe you said something in your sleep," Haruka offered and then she noticed the girls eyes went wide.

"Well if that's the case then when need to get to him quickly!" Evangeline snapped as she grabbed Haruka's arm and dragged her out of the door and down the stairs.

"Hey what's your hurry?" Haruka asked as she was dragged head over heels down the stone steps.

"I probably didn't mention the fact that the mayor takes his secret service with him!" Evangeline stated her voice full of panic and worry.

"That could be a problem," Haruka stated in a deadpan tone of voice.

"That's why we have to hurry!" Evangeline responded as she rushed past the tea house and on to the evening sun lit streets.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"A trashy room in the red light district is the secret spot?" Keitaro questioned as he stood waiting by room 317. "I mean for someone so religious what happened to "Thou shall not covet another man's wife"? Hypocrite, and then he has the nerve to label me a heretic!" Keitaro continued to gripe until he saw a pair quickly approaching. "Here he comes," Keitaro said to himself as he flexed his hands back and forth. Unfortunately the pair approaching was not the pair that he was anticipating.

"Keitaro!" Evangeline shouted as she ran up to him and punched him in the stomach. Although it wasn't particularly powerful it did sting which was enough for Keitaro to wince and gasp sharply.

"Evangeline, Haruka!?" Keitaro wheezed as he eyed the pair incredulously, "What are you doing here!?"

"Well nephew apparently you didn't hear about an important part of Evangeline's information," Haruka stated as she crushed a burnt out cigarette beneath her feet.

"Huh?" Keitaro questioned as he looked down at Evangeline who was glaring at him.

"The mayor doesn't go alone; he brings his secret service just in case!" Evangeline snapped, "That's why you should have just waited!"

"Um, duh?" was Keitaro's intelligent response as he stood stupefied by his own stupidity.

"Well now that you know, we better get out of here and come up with a plan quick," Haruka stated as she lit another cigarette.

"Right," Keitaro said with a nod and was about to say something else until her heard the sound of trouble quickly drawing near.

"Evangeline?" a concerned voice of an older woman said from behind the group as all turned to see a very attractive older woman, probably in her early thirties. She was dressed simply enough in a sky blue sundress and white shawl but her voluptuous body was enough to send Keitaro reeling with a nose bleed. Her long flowing platinum blond hair, piercing navy blue eyes, slender face, and pouty lips added an unimaginable level of beauty to her already perfect form.

'Now I can kinda understand the mayor's thought process,' Keitaro thought to himself.

"Mom!?" Evangeline cried out indignantly as she searched for something to say. "Nice weather we're having, huh?" Evangeline offered nervously with a sheepish chuckle.

"Young lady what are you doing here!?" Ms. McDowell snapped as she tried to approach her daughter only to be yanked back by the mayor's firm grip.

"My, my, Teresa, you should have taught your daughter that associating with heretics is a very bad decision," the Rupert stated as a maniacal grin spread across his lips, "In fact it leads to death in most cases."

"You can't be serious!" Teresa gasped as she yanked her arm out of the man's grasp and stared at him incredulously.

"Oh I'm sure you wish I were not, but unfortunately anyone who associates with this young man must die," Rupert stated as he began to laugh manically, "It's amazing that he survived the run with my chimera's but I should have expected that of the great Keitaro Urashima. Thus is why I put that hit out for him, unfortunately those fools were too scared to even approach him, but no matter! This ends now!"

"Keitaro, I want you to get this little girl and her mother out of here. Do you understand," Haruka whispered through gritted teeth as she reached inside her jacket pocket.

"What about you?" Ketiaro inquired with a look of disbelief plastered across his face before he hissed, "I'm not just going to leave you alone! Especially not if he has the Philosopher's Stone!"

"Do you want this little girl and her mother to die?" Haruka questioned as an audible click could be heard from within the confines of her jacket.

Keitaro simply stared at her in disbelief for a moment before he looked down at the quivering Evangeline who seemed ready to burst into tears at any moment. Then he looked toward her mother who was slowly backing away from the crazy monkey man. "No," he responded solemnly as he scooped up a surprised Evangeline who gasped once lifted in the air. "Just make sure that you don't die, okay?" Keitaro asked as he continued to eye his aunt with a look of fear and worry in his chocolate brown orbs.

"Don't worry about me, I'll be just fine," Haruka stated with a dark chuckle, "Now get that girl and her mother out of here now!"

Upon hearing the older woman snapped Keitaro dashed over to Teresa and using his free hand grabbed hers dragging her away from the deranged primate.

"Mwhaha, oh no you don't! Men take them down immediately!" Rupert snapped as thirteen men jumped out from various locations around the room. All were wearing black suits, white dress shirts, and were caring sub-machine guns.

"Oh no YOU don't!" Haruka snapped as she drew out her custom made 9mm pistol. She fired six shots before the men could even turn around and face her. The shots hit six of the goons in various vital spots causing them to crumple on the street.

"Impressive," Rupert chimed in as he dug a blood red orb out of his pocket, "It seems my secret service will be useless against one such as yourself, so allow me to up the ante. Now you shall fear the power of God!" With that said the orb began to glow a vibrant crimson. Within in second what remained of the goons had their souls drawn into the orb, their bodies turned to ash.

'That's definitely not the Philosophers Stone,' Haruka thought to herself as she too a long drag on her cigarette and waited for Rupert to make his move, 'But it doesn't look like I should take it lightly either way. Time for a little alchemy!'

"Now die you wretched woman!" Rupert snapped as the orb began to glow a vibrant crimson again.

"Heh," was Haruka's response as she grinned maliciously. Taking a marker out of her pocket she quickly drew a generic transmutation circle on her glove. Slamming her hand on the ground with a sudden surge of energy that could be felt erupting under the ground itself she focused on stopping the beast before her. Suddenly a stone sword shot up from the ground slicing Rupert clean down the middle.

"Too easy," Haruka stated with a smirk as she gazed at her handy work when all of a sudden Rupert faded like an apparition. "What the?" Haruka questioned as she stared dumbfounded at the scene before her.

"You didn't think it would be that easy did you?" a sinister voice chimed in from behind Haruka. It sounded like liquid death to her ears and she felt her blood run cold as she turned around to face the chimp like man with a diabolic smirk on his hideous face. Before Haruka could even complete her turn she felt a fist slam into her back sending her slamming through one of the love rooms across the street.

"Heh, back atcha," Rupert stated as he sauntered over to the fallen woman. "Now, like I said, prepare to witness the power of God," Rupert stated as he grabbed the bleeding and battered woman's broken body up by her collar. There was a steady stream of blood pouring down her forehead, a deep cut along her cheek, and her bottom lip was busted. Her uniform was completely ruined with several rips in the fabric and missing pieces. However, Haruka couldn't take note of any of this due to the fact that she was unconscious.

Rupert switched his grip from the woman's collar to her neck and began to squeeze tightly cutting of any circulation within her body. Suddenly his hand began to glow a vibrant crimson similar to that off the orb and he whispered, "I'm going to decompose your very being you silly wench!"

"Like hell you are!" a voice bellowed down the street.

"What the?" Rupert questioned as he gazed down that street in the direction of the voice.

"Get your hands off of my aunt!" Keitaro hollered as he clapped his hands together and they began to glow neon green. Parting his hands a spear started to compose until his hands were completely parted and the spear had taken on its full form once again.

"He created that spear without even using a transmutation circle!" Rupert said to himself as his grip loosened around Haruka's throat, and the glowing started to subside. 'So it's true, in order to obtain the ability to use alchemy without having to form transmutation circles he sold his fortune…so he really is The Unfortunate Alchemist.'

"Put my aunt down and give the stone Rupert, otherwise I'll have no choice but to rip you limb from limb. Trust me when I say that I'd really rather not," Keitaro stated as he approached the snarling man.

"Do you honestly think I would allow the power of the Stone to fall in the hands of a heathen like you!?" Rupert snapped as he flung Haruka's body off to the side. "Prepare to die Unfortunate Alchemist!" Rupert hollered as he disappeared from sight.

"That old trick huh?" Keitaro stated with a sigh, "Don't tell me that's the best you can do with the Stone's power." Suddenly Rupert appeared behind Keitaro with his fist drawn back and ready to strike. "Oh man, I dropped my wallet," Keitaro stated as he bent down to retrieve the article and inadvertently dodged Rupert's attack. "Man I really would have been in a bind if I had lost this, anyway" Keitaro stated turning his attention back to Rupert, "Hey where'd you just come from?"

To say Rupert was pissed off would be an understatement, and a big one. "Die Urashima!" Rupert cried out as the stone began to glow again. Suddenly a several chimeras appeared in front of Keitaro. All of them resembled a cross between a snake and a dog, and each had a hungry look on their snarling faces.

"Bring it!" Keitaro shouted back as he too tried to charge his adversaries with his spear ready to strike. Apparently both had forgotten about Keitaro's bad luck because neither one was prepared for what happened next.

As Keitaro charged the disfigured man her accidentally tripped over his shoe lace and fell flat on his face, but not before his spear flew from his hands slicing through everyone of the chimeras and snagging on Rupert's belt, tearing his pants clean off. Now if that hadn't been bad enough it just so happened that it was this day that Rupert decided to wear briefs instead of boxers. However, these were not just any pair of briefs, but were in fact a pair of briefs with Dopey Dog, a famous children's cartoon character, right on the crotch.

"Holy," Keitaro muttered as he looked up and felt his eyes roll to the back of his head in fright.

"Dear God what have you done!" Rupert shouted as he tossed on what remained of his pants and glared daggers into Keitaro.

"Wow, you don't see that everyday," Ketiaro muttered to himself as his mind's eye recovered from what he had just seen.

"I'll pay you back ten fold for this humiliation Urashima!" Rupert snapped as he turned and ran away.

"No! Give me the Stone first!" Keitaro cried out as he ran in the direction the monkey man had gone only to be yanked onto the ground by a powerful force.

"Calm down you idiot, it was a fake and that idiot is long gone," Haruka stated as she nursed her sore lip.

"Haruka you're okay!" Keitaro cried out as he tried to hug the older woman only to be slapped on the head and into the ground by her fan.

"Not right now you moron," Haruka stated as she shakily rose to her feet.

"Sorry," Keitaro apologized sheepishly as he rubbed the sore spot on his head.

"Whatever, lets just go home," Haruka muttered as Keitaro helped maintain her balance.

"Right," Keitaro said as he nodded in agreement.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So you were defeated by Keitaro were you?" a young woman wearing a sultry black dress with a plugging neck line asked Rupert who hung his head in shame. Flicking back a stray strand of shoulder length black hair the bronze skinned beauty merely scoffed as she pouted her full lips and rolled her dark red eyes in disgust. "You humans really are useless, I give you the power of the stone and the best you can do is to squander it. Pathetic," the young woman stated as she turned to look out the window and gazed at the pale full moon. "You know looking at that pale moon, it makes me think of how empty we really are. How insubstantial our existence really is, but of course we have more of a reason to live then you humans do," the young woman stated with a beleaguered sigh as she turned to face Rupert. "You've out lived your usefulness," the young woman stated simply as she snapped her fingers.

"Mistress Amalla you can't be serious!" Rupert cried indignantly as his eyes went wide with fear and tears started to stream down his face. "Please, just give me another chance!" Rupert continued to cry only to receive a look of indifference in response.

"That's not my name fool," the young woman retorted with another sigh, "My name is Envy, the least you could have done was to have gotten that right before you died." With that said the door to the cheap dingy hotel room opened up and a shadowed figure swiftly stepped in and stood behind a catatonic Rupert.

"Be happy that you have the honor of become a meal for one of the greatest beings on this planet. We, the Homunculi, have a greater destiny then you could ever imagine, and since you could not stop our greatest adversary then in turn we have no more use for you. Goodbye fool," Envy stated with a malicious grin as a loud crunch rang through the lamppost lit empty streets below.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Well since that came up with nothing I think it's time I get going," Keitaro stated as he grabbed a change of cloths and tucked it into a duffel bag.

"Sorry to hear that nephew," Haruka stated as she fought back the urge to light a cigarette. Not that she could anyway due to the fact that she was covered almost head to toe in bandages; even so she still managed to fit into her spare uniform and it still looked quite good on her. However, to be honest it was a miracle that she could even walk, but then again she was Haruka Urashima. "You know I do have one lead for you," Haruka stated as she sat down on the bed next to Keitaro.

"Huh?" Keitaro looked up at Haruka with a puzzled expression on his face. "I thought you said I was a fool for trying to obtain the Stone," Keitaro stated as he averted his gaze and continued packing.

"I do," Haruka stated as she released a beleaguered sigh before adding, "But it's not like that's going to stop you anyway. So do you want the lead or not?"

"Yeah," Keitaro said with a faint smile as he looked his aunt in her chocolate brown orbs.

"Okay, all you have to do is become a State Alchemist in Amestris and you'll be set if they let you into the top secret stuff," Haruka stated she painfully got up from the bed with Keitaro's aid.

"Thanks Haruka, I owe you one," Keitaro stated as he grabbed his bag and head toward the entrance following behind Haruka.

When they got to the entrance they were greeted by all of Tresembol Manor's occupants. The odd part was the fact that they all have bags of luggage. Naru was dressed in a green sundress and a thin white jacket, Motoko in her usual kendo garb, Kitsune in a brown corduroy jacket, tan khaki pants, and pink sweater, Shinobu in her school uniform, and Su in a school uniform similar to Shinobu's.

"Huh?" Keitaro said aloud to himself, "I wonder what's going on here."

"So you all are leaving too?" Haruka inquired in a deadpan tone of voice as she opened the door and stepped out onto the deck.

"Yeah," Naru answered solemnly for everyone present, "It's about time that we all went for our exams. When we came here it was in hopes of becoming State Alchemist, but since Tresembol doesn't even have an active military anymore we decided to head to Amestris since they've started to rebuild their military. Even if it is under that control of the government instead of the military."

"So you all are heading there too?" Keitaro inquired as he walked toward the door.

"You're going there too!" Naru cried out indignantly as she pointed vehemently at Keitaro.

"Yep!" Keitaro said, "I was just above to drive off, if you all want a lift I'd be more then happy to give you one!"

"But you don't have a car," Kitsune pointed out as she eyed him skeptically.

"Well grandma called Haruka and told her to let me have one of the ones in the garage," Keitaro said all the while beaming, "I would be honored to have you all as my company."

Naru's hard expression softened into a cute pout as she responded, "Whatever, yeah we'll go with you. Just don't try anything perverted."

"Wouldn't dream of it!" Keitaro stated as he walked out the door and toward the stairs. As everyone reached the last step Keitaro abruptly stopped.

"What is it sempai?" Shinobu inquired nervously as she looked over Keitaro's shoulder to see a little girl wearing a blue private school uniform.

"I just wanted to say good-bye, we'll be leaving soon," Evangeline stated nervously as she averted her eyes to her feet as a blush threaten to creep onto her cheeks.

Keitaro chuckled lightly as he approached the young woman. "I'm sure we'll meet again one day Evangeline, so don't worry," Keitaro stated as he bent down and pulled the girl into a bear hug, "Thanks for all of your help."

Evangeline felt her cheeks flush as she hesitantly returned the embrace at first, but then became increasingly comforted by it. "Okay Keitaro, it's a promise," Evangeline stated as she broke the hug with a smile and tears forming in the corners of her teal colored eyes.

"Yeah, it's a promise," Keitaro stated with a smile and they both chuckled.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Okay everyone lets go!" Keitaro shouted as he started up the car. It resembled an early black 40's model, and due to the fact that no one had bothered to update the makes and models lately it was still top of the line.

"Maybe it would be best if we took a train Motoko suggested from the back seat. Naru, Kitsune, Su, and she were packed like a can of sardines and, despite the smoothness of the ride and the feeling of the leather interior, they were very uncomfortable to say the least.

"I don't see what is so bad," Shinobu stated enjoying the fact that she got to sit in the passenger seat next to her sempai. She couldn't help but blush from ear to ear whenever she looked up and saw Keitaro look back at her. She was in paradise, and she wouldn't let the "party poopers" in the back ruin it for her.

"Tell you what, we'll get on the train once we get to the bridge. How does that sound," Keitaro asked as he waved to Evangeline and her parents as they drove past their car and several government cars.

"That's a sixteen hour drive!" Naru complained.

"Well singing makes the time pass quicker so let's sing one of my favorites…Yankee Doodle!" Keitaro stated excitedly as he began to sing off key.

Everyone's eyes went wide, including Su's, and they all screamed a resounding "NO!!!" Four seconds later Keitaro had been knocked into lower earth's orb by a group "Naru Punch".

**To be continued**

**Next Episode: Reminiscence**

**Author's Note: Well I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter, it's a long one…well at least the longest I've ever written. Anyway, I liked the edition of Evangeline in this chapter and I hope you did too. If you're wondering why she isn't some emo-vampire it's because she's still human (a resounding duh for those of you who didn't know that). Of course some of you would argue "Well what the heck is Evangeline doing in a fic like this anyway?" and my rebuttal would be, "To develop a character that some of you already know and love but in a different way. And also for you to grow attached to her and then rip her away just when you've started to like her most. Kinda like in the show "Fullmetal Alchemist". Plus Evangeline fits in really well with this story, especially later on when the angst kicks into high gear. However, I don't want to give too much away so just keep reading if you're interested. AS ALWAYS PLEASE REVIEW. ALSO FEEL FREE TO FLAME.**


	3. Reminiscence

Disclaimer- I do not own Love Hina or Fullmetal Alchemist, they both be long to their respective copyright holders…which are not me unfortunately.

Author's Note: Thank you to everyone who were kind enough to review, or flame, or whatever!

**The Philosophy Behind Lies**

**Episode 3: Reminiscence**

"This has got to be the longest car ride I have ever been on in my life," Naru groused from the backseat. While she had tried to fall asleep hours ago she had been incapable of doing so due to the fact that Su was snoring right in her ear. Not only that, but the young woman's breath wrecked of banana which only added insult to injury.

"Sorry," Keitaro offered with a sheepish chuckle as he continued to navigate the winding dirt road through vast green planes. "I didn't know it would take this long." It was true, Keitaro hadn't expected that it would take him as long as it did for him to fall out of lower earth's orbit. By the time he had finally come down it was almost noon, and now they were driving through the moon lit planes twelve hours outside Tresembol.

"Idiot, I told you it was a sixteen hour drive," Naru muttered to herself as she wrenched Su's jaw open and pulled her hair out of the young woman's mouth.

"Mhmm, my banana," Su mumbled in her sleep with a pout due to the loss of Naru's hair in her mouth.

"Great, now my hair smells like Su's saliva and banana. Things couldn't get any better than this!" Naru continued to grouse.

"Well it seems everyone else was able to get to sleep okay," Keitaro commented as he looked through his rear view mirror and noted the snoring Kitsune and a small bit of drool rolling down Motoko's cheek. Looking over to the passenger seat he smiled as he heard Shinobu giggle in her sleep and then mumble something he couldn't quite catch. It sounded like she had said his name, but there was no way that he could be sure. Either way looking at the young woman sleep reminded him of his sister, and a past that he would just as soon rather forget.

"You know, she reminds me a lot of my little sister," Keitaro stated as he turned his attention back to the road as to avoid getting into an accident.

"You mean Shinobu?" Naru asked as she raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Yeah, she looks just like my sister did when she was sleeping," Keitaro stated a smile evident in his voice.

"Don't tell me you molested your little sister," Naru stated as she slanted her eyes dangerously while continuing to gaze at the back of Keitaro's head.

"No, despite the fact that she was my adopted sister I never had those kinds of feelings for her," was Keitaro's response, his voice was hard and left no room for comment.

Deciding to change to subject due to her childish comment Naru asked, "So where is she now?"

Keitaro grew stiff for a moment before his voice grew low and he mumbled, "She's dead…she died fourteen years ago."

Naru immediately regretted asking about his sister as she gasped and said, "Oh my god, I'm so sorry."

Keitaro chuckled and said, "Don't worry about it, you didn't know after all so there really was no reason for you not to ask." Although he tried to make his voice sound chipper it didn't work out quite the way he had planned. In fact he sounded down right pathetic.

After a long stiff silence Naru asked, "Would you mind telling me about her, and about you? I really would like to know a little about your past, and if you're interested I could tell you mine." She noted that Keitaro looked at her with eyes full of confusion through his rear view mirror and she quickly added, "It's just that I hear conversation makes time pass by faster!"

Keitaro chuckled once again and said, "Okay, I guess I'll go first."

**-Flashback-**

"Keitaro we're home, and we have someone we'd like you to meet!" Mr. Urashima bellowed. He was a slender man who wore a pair of small sleek frames, had short brown hair that was cut neatly into a mid-fade around the sides, deep jade green eyes, and a square shaped face right down to his rugged square chin. He wore a white dress shirt under a black blazer, and black khaki pants. Next to him stood Mrs. Urashima who was a short and slightly chubby woman with a friendly face, long black hair which extended down to the mid section of her back, and deep chocolate brown eyes. She was currently wearing and apron covering in sugar, and a pink dress which extended down to her ankles.

"Mom! Dad! You're back!" a young Keitaro cried out exuberantly as he ran down the birch wood steps of their two story house. Keitaro was currently donning a elementary school uniform which included a black blazer, white dress shirt, red tie, and black khaki pants. His hair was a mess a usual, but he was without his trademark glasses.

Keitaro stopped in mid-stride as he took note of the little girl wearing a powder blue sundress and squeezing a black toy cat to her chest as though he life depended on it. She looked very nervous, in fact he knees were shaking slightly.

"Um, mom, dad, who is she?" Keitaro inquired as he walked up the little girl who squeaked and looked down at her feet shyly as a blush found its way to her cheeks.

"She's your new sister Keitaro, and her name is Kanako," Mrs. Urashima stated with a warm smile. "Well now that you two have been introduced I have to head back to the shop. I'm really sorry that I can't stay you two, but the candy doesn't sell itself," Mrs. Urashima stated as she gave Keitaro a kiss on the forehead as well as Kanako before she headed out the door.

"Well kids I've got to get back to work otherwise I'm going to get fired, and it's really hard to find a job as a State Alchemist after you've lost your position as one somewhere else," Mr. Urashima stated as he ruffled the children's hair affectionately and stepped out the door behind Keitaro's mother.

After their parents had left Keitaro and Kanako simply stared at one another for a moment before Keitaro grinned and said, "Hi my name's Keitaro and I guess I'm your big brother now!"

"Big brother?" Kanako questioned as she simply gazed into the boy's chocolate brown orbs, confusion evident in her eyes.

"Yep! So do you want to play?" Keitaro inquired but as soon as he was about to turn around and leave he was nearly tackled by Kanako.

"Big brother," Kanako stated affectionately as she pulled Keitaro into a tight embrace, and a blush crept onto her cheeks.

Keitaro was taken aback for a moment but soon recovered and returned the hug with a small smile. "Yeah, I'm your big brother."

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Wow! This place is so big!" Kanako cried out as they approached Tresembol Manor. She was currently dressed in a black sundress similar to the one she had worn when she had first met Keitaro, and she was also sporting a white wide brimmed hat with a black ribbon.

"Yeah it sure is," Keitaro stated with a smile as he took Kanako's hand in his, "Come on, I'm going to take you to meet grandma!" Keitaro was currently dressed in his school uniform.

"Okay!" Kanako said excitedly as they ran through the doors and up the spiral staircase towards Hinata's room. Upon opening the door they were surprised to find no one in the room.

"Where's grandma?" Kanako inquired as she stepped into the room and looked around.

"Hmm, I don't know," Keitaro admitted as he followed behind her and looked around, "She's usually here most of the time, unless she's out doing grown up stuff."

"Are you two looking for someone," a sweet elderly voice chimed from behind the pair. Whipping around Keitaro and Kanako saw Hinata standing the door way wearing her usual maroon colored kimono. Her wrinkly old face was beaming at the pair before her as she walked over to them and pulled them into a loving hug. "My, my, Keitaro I haven't seen you in awhile," Hinata stated as she broke the hug and gazed lovingly at the young man before her. Turning toward Kanako she said, "It's a pleasure to finally meet you Kanako, and I'm happy to hear that you're going to be my granddaughter. I've always wanted a cute little granddaughter."

Hinata's comment made Kanako blush from ear to ear as she whispered a small thank you in response. This made Hinata laugh boisterously as she responded, "There's no need to be so shy child, you're amongst family now!" Kanako simply smiled in response and nodded her head.

"My you two are a sight for sore eyes," Hinata continued, "But you could do without the smell. Why don't you two go take a bath?"

"Sure grandma," Keitaro stated excitedly as he grabbed Kanako's hand once again and lead her toward a familiar bathroom. "I always like this bath tub best because it's so big!" Keitaro stated as they entered the bathroom and he twisted the sterling silver knobs.

"Wow," was all Kanako could say in response as she looked around the bathroom with a look of amazement in her sparkling eyes.

"I guess," Keitaro stated with a chuckle as he began to strip off his cloths, "Well what are you waiting for, lets get in!" With that said Keitaro hopped in the tub causing some of the water to splash over the side.

Kanako simply stood by the tub blushing wildly and looking at her feet.

"What's wrong?" Keitaro inquired, "Don't be shy, we're family remember!"

"O-O-Okay," Kanako responded nervously as she stripped off her cloths and hopped in the tub causing a little water to flow over.

"Okay, you can wash my back and I'll wash yours," Keitaro stated as he grabbed a bar of soap and began to lather up his wash cloth. Kanako simply sat in front of him with her shoulders hunched and blushing so much that her head could be mistaken for a tomato.

'Why am I thinking like this, he's my brother,' Kanako thought to herself as she listened to Keitaro hum Yankee Doodle, 'But I can't stop feeling this way about him, I just wish I knew what to do.' He mental musings were cut short as she yelped upon feeling something soft touch her back.

"What's wrong?" Keitaro asked with concern evident in his voice as he began to scrub her back.

"N-N-Nothing," Kanako stuttered out as she eased into Keitaro's gentle touch, allowing him to wash her back.

"Say Kanako," Keitaro started as he continued to wash her back with a look of concentration in his eyes.

"Yes?" Kanako stated as she waited for him to continue.

"What do you say, when we get older and grandma leaves us this place, what do you say that we run it as an inn…together? It can be our promise," Keitaro stated as he placed the wash cloth in the water and cupped his hands allowing water to flow in.

Kanako was silent for a moment as her mouth hung agape, but then she smiled and replied, "I'd like that a lot Keitaro."

"Huh?" Keitaro said as he allowed the water to fall out of his hands and to splash off Kanako's back cleaning off the remaining dirt and suds.

Kanako immediately realized that she had said Keitaro rather than big brother and was about to apologize until she heard Keitaro speak up again.

"I think that's the first time that you've ever called me Keitaro…it's nice," Keitaro commented as he grabbed the bar of soap and began to lather up Kanako's ebony locks.

This comment caused Kanako to blush and she simply nodded in response as she allowed Keitaro to wash her hair.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Big brother wait for me!" a toddler Kanako cried as she chased after her older brother down a winding dirt road. While her older brother had longer legs and a better stride the short blue khaki skirt she was wearing didn't help matters. On top of that the collar of the sleeveless white dress shirt she was wearing was rubbing against her neck and was starting to irritate her, along with her small brown leather shoes which pinched her feet.

"Come on Kanako, you've got to keep up!" a younger Keitaro shouted from up ahead as he nimbly jumped over a moss covered log. Keitaro was currently dressed in a black tee-shirt, tan khaki shorts, and a pair of black leather shoes. Both were running down an old heavily forested pathway toward a location that Keitaro was currently keeping a secret from Kanako. The pathway in and of itself was a wonder to behold with very little sun light seeping in through the thick leaves and branches of the grand old oak trees above causing the ground to look slightly freckled. The long grass was I vibrant green and reached up to Kanako's ankles and in the distance one could see several tulips off all shades sprouting up just in time for the end of spring. All in all the entire scene had an ethereal feel about it, and Kanako would have liked to enjoy it and the cooling breeze that flowed through the tunnel of trees. Unfortunately she was too preoccupied trying to keep up with her speeding brother who could seem to careless about the scene around him.

"I'm trying," Kanako cried out pathetically as she climbed over the same log that Keitaro had simply jumped over. "Slow down you dummy!"

This comment stopped Keitaro dead in his tracks as he turned to face a wheezing Kanako, who currently had her hands on her knees, with a glare on his scrunched up face. "Take it back," Keitaro demanded as he puffed out his cheeks.

"Huh?" Kanako asked in genuine confusion as she furrowed her brow.

"Take back what you said about me being a dummy, otherwise I'm not going to show you my secret place," Keitaro stated as he sat down defiantly on the dirt road causing a cloud of dust to form and him to cough violently.

Upon seeing this Kanako started to giggle into her hand and said, "Well that was dumb!"

Keitaro chuckled sheepishly as he scratched the nape of his neck in embarrassment and admitted, "Yeah I guess it was." After that both had a good laugh and then continued toward Keitaro's secret spot, but this time at a slower pace.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Wow!" Kanako cried out as she gazed at the clear sparkling water of the small waterfall in front of her. Nestled between two large oak trees the waterfall looked almost like a gateway into another world.

"Well what are you waiting for?" Keitaro stated as he started to strip of his cloths leaving on his boxers on. He stretched his arms and legs out a bit and turned to regard Kanako with a puzzled expression on his face. "What's wrong?" Keitaro asked a demurring Kanako.

"You're in your underwear," Kanako stated numbly as she stared at her underwear clad brother with eyes as big as saucers.

"Yeah?" Keitaro stated not quite understanding what Kanako was so worked up about. "What about it?" Keitaro inquired and after a few seconds the realization dawned on him that Kanako was not his sister by DNA. "Oh," Keitaro stated sheepishly as he scratched the nape of his neck nervously while looking down at his feet. After a moment of complete silence Keitaro spoke up once again, "Hey what does it matter, we're brother and sister after all so there's nothing weird about this."

Kanako simply stared at him for a moment, eyes still wide, before nodded numbly and began took off her skirt.

"Alright! Let's go!" Keitaro cried as he ran over to the edge of the cliff they were currently perched on top of. "Wahoooo!" Keitaro cried out as he jumped off of the cliff and into the sparkling white waters below with a loud splash.

Kanako sheepishly stepped toward the edge of the cliff as she watched her brother resurface with a broad grin on his face.

"Hey don't be shy, come on! The water's great!" Keitaro shouted as he cupped his hands over his mouth.

"Um, okay," Kanako responded nervously as she closed her eyes and jumped. "Eeee," was Kanako's shrill cry as she began to free fall down toward the waters below. When she hit the water she felt a slight stinging on her feet and then she was instantly submerged underneath the falls.

"Kanako!" Keitaro cried out as he dived underneath the water and swam toward his drowning sister. Upon reaching her he was surprised when she dug her nails into his back drawing a tiny bit of blood, but he quickly recovered as swam to the surface as quickly as his legs would allow.

Upon reaching the surface both coughed up a mouthful of water and continued to cough for a moment as Keitaro swam over toward the sandy shore. Laying Kanako down on her side Keitaro gingerly patted her back to make sure she got all of the water out of her system. "Are you alright Kanako?" Keitaro inquired with a look of worry etched onto his features.

"I'm fine big brother," Kanako whispered as she coughed violently.

"That was scary," Keitaro stated with a sigh as he allowed himself to fall onto his back and take a deep breath in order to relax his distraught nerves.

"I'm sorry big brother," Kanako stated solemnly.

"About what? If anything I shouldn't have been dumb enough to tell you to jump!" Keitaro stated as he gazed up into the clearing at the fluffy white nimbus clouds above.

"But even still," Kanako started as she kept her back turned away from her brother.

"But still nothing, I should have been more careful. I'm just glad you're okay," Keitaro stated as he grabbed a fist full of white sand and allowed the grainy texture to run through his fingers. "Let's not talk about this anymore, okay?" Keitaro stated after a moment as he slowly rose to his feet and gazed out on the shimmering water from the waterfall.

"Okay," Kanako stated sheepishly as she got up and walked to her brother's side. "Thank you for saving me big brother," Kanako stated with a blush as she grabbed Keitaro's hand in hers.

Keitaro also sported a blush for a moment as he responded, "Don't worry about it, it's my job as your big brother to protect you. So whenever you're in trouble I'll be there to protect you, okay?"

Kanako smiled an uncharacteristic small smile and nodded affirmatively. The rest of the day was spent swimming or lounging in the water until the evening sun set in and both decided it was time to go home before their parents got worried.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Now you're getting the hang of it!" Keitaro said as Kanako did a cannonball into the water. He was once again wearing nothing but his boxers.

"Well you taught me well Keitaro," Kanako stated with a giggle as she floated in the water on her back. This time Kanako had thought ahead and brought her black one piece bathing suit, and she had also tied her hair into it's usual ponytail.

"I guess," Keitaro admitted humbly as he joined her. "I've been watching dad lately, you know when he practices his alchemy," Keitaro started as he gazed at the clouds again. "I just don't think becoming an alchemist is for me, but he keeps telling me that 'his son will be a State Alchemist, it's in the blood after all'," Keitaro finished his voice deep as to parrot his fathers.

"I think you would be a very good State Alchemist," Kanako stated humbly as a blush crept on to her cheeks, "In fact I think you'd be great at whatever you wanted to do big brother."

"You think so?" Keitaro stated as he looked over at Kanako with a look of disbelief plastered across his features. Kanako simply nodded in response as a small smile graced her lips. Keitaro looked at the girl for another minute before he returned to looking at the clouds.

"Don't forget that you did make a promise to that other girl," Kanako pointed out. Despite the fact that she wanted Keitaro to herself she would not forsake his happiness for her own.

"Oh yeah, I guess I really do have to become a State Alchemist after all. That way we'll be able to keep our promises!" Keitaro stated excitedly. Kanako only nodded in response. The two of them floated there gazing at the clouds for a few more minutes before Keitaro noticed that the clouds had started to go black.

"Looks like rain," he stated as a chill blew though the air causing Kanako and himself to shiver. "We better get home before it starts to rain," Keitaro stated with a beleaguered sigh as he flipped over and began to swim toward the shore with Kanako close behind.

Upon reaching the shore they both began to dry themselves off until they heard a loud smashing sound. Whipping around Keitaro saw several trees fall onto the forest floor and heard a loud thumping drawing near.

"Big brother?" Kanako questioned nervously as she clutched his arm for comfort and protection.

"I don't know what it is," Keitaro stated with fear evident in his eyes, "But we need to get out of here right now!" "Hurry up Kanako," Keitaro said breaking the grip the girl had on his arm and grabbing her cloths, "Put these on and get out of here! I'll be right behind you!"

"Big brother?" Kanako questioned as she eyed him with eyes full of fright.

"Just get out of here, like I told you it's my job as your big brother to protect you!" Keitaro hollered as forced her into her red shirt and blue jean overalls.

"But what about you?" Kanako questioned as she gripped his arm tightly, "What's going to happen to you!?"

"I don't know," Keitaro stated honestly as he snatched his arm out of her grasp and yelled, "I told you to get out of here! Now go!" With that he pushed her up the hill and ran back to retrieve his cloths. However, as soon as he reached the sand he came face to face with a young woman wearing a low cut black dress with a plugging neck line. Her bronze skin was gorgeous and her hair, raven black, was long and looked as if it was made of silk. Her mauve colored eyes bore a hole through Keitaro and he felt as though she was looking though his very soul.

"Keitaro Urashima," the woman stated with an evil smirk, "Finally, now I can be rid of you before you become a problem." With that said the woman's slender bronze hand turned in to a metallic spear like protrusion.

Keitaro was frozen stiff by fear as he simply stared at the woman with his mouth agape. After a moment he found his voice and stuttered out, "Who-who-who are you?"

"If you must know before you die," Envy started with a chuckle as she saw Keitaro visibly stiffen and his eyes grow even wider with fright, "My name is Envy and this was, heh, this was too easy." With that said she drove her hand down toward Keitaro's chest.

"Brother!" Kanako cried out as she shot out of the bushes pushed the boy out of the way in the nick of time; unfortunately she was not able to clear the blade herself. The sound of metal searing through bone could be heard as well as a sharp gasp and a cough.

Looking up from the sand Keitaro immediately looked for his sister around him, but when he couldn't find her he looked up toward Envy. Looking from Envy to her arm Keitaro took note of the blood running down the length of her arm. 'I'm not bleeding,' Keitaro thought to himself numbly as he continued to look down the metallic appendage. Suddenly he felt his heart drop and bile rise up in his throat. Before him he saw an impaled Kanako, her cheeks paler than usual, tears streaming down her porcelain skin, and a steady stream of blood flowing from her open mouth.

"Kanako," Keitaro gasped as tears started to stream down his cheeks unabatedly. "Kanako!" Keitaro cried out as he charged Envy with a snarl on his face. He swung at the woman only to be kneed violently in the stomach and to fall face first into the sand.

"What a nuisance," Envy stated with an evil smirk as she threw Kanako's body off to the side and focused in on Keitaro once again.

"I'll kill you," Keitaro muttered to himself as he crawled toward his pants pocket and drew out a piece of chalk. As he drew a generic transmutation circle in the sand Envy began to casually saunter over toward him.

"What can a brat like you do?" Envy questioned as she drew near.

"I'll kill you!" Keitaro snapped as he slapped his palm down on to the circle causing it to glow a pale green.

"Right," Envy said rolling her eyes, "You do that kid, but first let me get killing you out of the way." With that she charged Keitaro and drew her arm back ready to strike the finishing blow.

"Heh," was all Keitaro said as Envy stopped in mid-air due to the fact that she had begun to glow.

"What?" Envy stated as she gazed at her arms and legs in disbelief, "What have you done to me you moron!?"

"Essence Exchange, a Urashima family secret that can only be preformed by the youngest of our family," Keitaro stated with a smirk, "That means that I get your power and you get mine. Pretty much the first law of alchemy so to speak, and it works because we're both organic beings. Gotcha!"

"Like hell you have!" Envy snapped as she started to dispel the transmutation.

"Huh?" Keitaro exclaimed in shock as the glow dispelled.

"Now die you worm!" Envy snapped as she charged Keitaro once again, this time impaling him and sending lightning charging through his entire body. "Heh, now it's over," Envy stated with a smirk as she drew her blade out of his chest.

Keitaro peered down at the wound in disbelief as tears started to form in his eyes and he muttered, "I'm sorry Kanako, not only didn't I protect you but I couldn't even avenge your death…I'm so sorry." With that Keitaro feel on the sand defeated and dying.

"Time to get out of here," Envy stated as she bounded up a tree and out of sight.

**-End Flashback-**

"But that doesn't make any sense!" Naru snapped indignantly from the back seat, "You're still alive!"

"I wasn't finished yet," Keitaro continued, "After that I awoke in my room to find my mother crying over my body. Somehow my father had went out to find Kanako and myself due to the fact that we hadn't come home that night. Apparently I had exchange my mortality for her immortality during the transmutation, that's the only thing that I think could explain why I was still alive. In fact this theory was supported by the fact that I later came to find out the Envy was the name of a Homonculi, and they were, for all intents and purposes, practically immortal beings made from the sins of man.

"So you're saying that the only reason that you aren't dead and that we haven't seriously injured you is because you have the regenerative abilities of a Homonculi?" Naru questioned in disbelief.

"That about sums it up," Keitaro stated with a shrug, "Believe me if you want, don't if you want. Doesn't really matter to me one way or the other in the end."

"Okay fine, but what happened to your sister?" Naru continued.

"We had a funeral, one that I cried at the whole time," Keitaro stated simply in a deadpan tone of voice.

"Sorry," Naru muttered immediately feeling stupid for asking such an insensitive question.

Keitaro simply waved it off as he continued, "So it was after that when I decided that I would do whatever it took to bring my sister back. So I became a State Alchemist after failing three times and then deciding to exchange my "good fortune" as a means to be able to perform transmutations without a circle or any other device. Needless to say I was able to pass my exams with flying colors, but after that my luck was all but good to say the least. Proof being the fact that you would have killed me the first time we met had I not had the powers that I do. Anyway, that explains my searh for the Philosopher's Stone, due to the fact that it can transmutate anything. With it I'll be able to revivie my sister without consequence."

"I guess that makes sense," Naru begrudgingly admitted as she stifled a yawn. After a long pause Naru released a beleagured sigh and said, "Well I guess it's my turn." However before she could start the car came to an abrupt halt. Looking out the window she noted two soldiers approach the drivers seat and lean in to say something to Keitaro who's eyes went wide and he began to chuckle nervously.

"I guess we really should have taken the train," Keitaro stated sheepishly as he started up the car again.

"What do you mean?" Naru inquired as she eyed Keitaro incredulously.

"Well it seems the bridge is closed due to construction, so the only way to Armestris is through Reutuma," Keitaro stated with a nervous chuckle as he drove down the detour path.

"You have got to be (explicit) me!" Naru bellowed as she shot Keitaro out of the car with a Naru Punch that sent him into lower earth's orbit, and woke everyone in the car up. "Glad to see you're up Kitsune," Naru stated darkly as the older woman yawned, "Now you get to sit next to Su!"

Kitsune's eyes went wide with fright but as soon as Keitaro returned from the stratosphere she founder herself in Su's vice grip. "Great, just great," Kitsune mumbled as Su started to squeeze the life out of her.

**To be continued**

**Next Episode: Birth of the Dark Evangeline Part 1: The Eccentric State Alchemist**

**Author's Note: Hoped everyone liked this chapter, I like to at least get up to three before I start slacking off. However, rest assured that both A Royal Pain? and this story will be updated soon enough. Okay, next chapter is going to be a big one what with Evangeline finally turning into a vampire and all. I hope you're ready for a little angst because it's coming your way. By the way, whoever thinks that Seta is going to be the LIKE, not exactly, Mustang of this fic are in fact correct. And no, Dark Knight Gafgar, Sarah will not be the Riza of this fic, that's just sick and wrong…although it might be kinda funny. Hmmm I see potential, anyway AS ALWAYS PLEASE REVIEW AND FEEL FREE TO FLAME IF IT SUX!**


End file.
